A  MELODRAMA  OF  THE  SOCIAL  EVIL 
in  Six  Acts  and  Nineteen  Scenes 

BY       gmpcroit 
CHARLES  K.  HELD 

Author  of  "The  Man  in  the  Forest,"  "The  Owl  and  Care," 
"The  Cave  Man,"  Etc.,  Etc..  Etc, 

AND 

PORTER  GARNETT 

Author  of  "Mazuma,  or  Bored  by  the  Board" ;  "The  Conquest  c*  the 

Philistines"  ;  ''The  Triumph  of  Love."  a  Pantomime; 

"The  Green  Knight,"  a  Vision;  Etc.,  Etc.,  Etc. 


San 

THE   BOHEMIAN   CLUB 
1914 


vg. 


ACT  III,  Scene  3. 

EXTER    MME.    NECESSITY. 

"So  this  is  Bohemia?   Well,  well,  well,  well,  well!" 


A  MELODRAMA  OF  THE  SOCIAL  EVIL 
In  Six  Acts  and  Nineteen  Scenes 

BY 

CHARLES  K.  HELD 

Author  of  "The  Man  in  the  Forest,"  "The  Owl  and  Care," 
"The  Cave  Man,"  Etc.,  Etc..  Etc. 

AND 

PORTER  GARNETT 

Author  of  "Mazum'a,  or  Bored  by  the  Board";  "The  Conquest  of  the 

Philistines";  ''The  Triumph  of  Love,"  a  Pantomime; 

"The  Green  Knight,"  a  Vis4on;  Etc.,  Etc..  Etc. 


THE   BOHEMIAN    CLUB 
1914 


This  play  has  been  copyrighted  under  the  laws  of  the 
Ununited  States  of  Bohemia. 

All  acting  rights,  both  professional  and  amateur,  are 
reserved  in  the  Ununited  States  of  Bohemia,  the  United 
States  of  America,  Great  Britain,  Massachusetts,  and 
all  other  civilized  and  semi-civilized  countries,  and  in 
Los  Angeles.  Performances  forbidden  and  right  of  rep- 
resentation reserved.  Piracy  and  infringement  will  be 
prosecuted  in  accordance  with  penalties  provided  by  the 
Bohemian  Statutes:  Sec.  4966,  Bohemian  Revised  Stat- 
utes, Title  60,  Chap.  3. 

Permission  to  perform  this  play  must  be  obtained 
from  St.  John  of  Nepomuk. 

Persons  desiring  to  read  this  play  professionally  in 
public,  in  saloons,  cafes,  restaurants,  dives,  schools  or 
colleges,  hotels,  or  on  the  street  corners,  must  first  apply 
to  the  Chairman  of  the  Committee  of  Publicity  and 
Promotion  of  the  Owl  Theatre  Company,  Ltd. 

The  Peangelus  and  phonograph  rights  are  the  .  ex- 
clusive property  of  the  Maginnity  Penny  Arcade  and 
Novelty  Company  of  New  Zealand. 

The  Motion  Picture  privileges  have  been  acquired  by 
the  Associated  Villainies. 

All  rights  reserved,  including  that  of  translation 
into  foreign  languaees,  including  the  Scandinavian  and 
English. 


Bancroft  Library 


TO 


OF 

THE   REAL   BOHEMIA 

WHOSE 
PATHETIC  HISTORY 

IS 

HERE 

FEEBLY  RECORDED 
THIS  PLAY 

IS 

TENDERLY 
DEDICATED 


The  management  of  the  Owl  Theatre  takes  this 
opportunity  to  express  its  gratitude  to  Mr.  Frank  L. 
Mathieu  for  his  able  direction  of  the  performance,  to 
Mr.  W.  H.  Smith,  Jr.  for  his  indispensable  assistance 
in  the  management  of  the  stage  and  for  his  distin- 
guished services  as  a  member  of  the  cast,  to 
Messrs.  Frank  Maroney,  George  Bell,  Clarence  Ward, 
Charles  Trowbridge,  Richard  M.  Hotaling,  Ralph  L. 
Phelps,  Frank  P.  Deering,  Bernard  Miller,  Harris 
Allen,  A.  G.  Heunisch,  Austin  Sperry,  Oscar  Frank, 
Herbert  Schmidt,  Robert  Bentley,  Mark  Daniels, 
Charles  Dillon,  Leroy  Ryone,  Amedee  Joullin,  and 
Charles  J.  Dickman  for  admirably  sustaining  their 
various  roles,  to  Messrs.  Harry  L.  Fonda,  J.  J.  Mora, 
and  W.  A.  Bryant  for  preparing  the  superb  scenic 
investiture  of  the  production,  to  Messrs.  Edward  J. 
and  Vincent  DufTey  for  devising-  and  operating  the 
magnificent  light  effects,  to  Mr.  G.  Saldierna  for  ar- 
ranging and  conducting  the  glorious  music,  to  Mr. 
Harry  P.  Carlton  for  taking  charge  of  the  multifar- 
ious properties,  to  Mr.  John  de  P.  Teller  for  direct- 
ing the  grand  choruses,  and  to  Messrs.  Fred  Hart, 
William  Nodder,  David  Matheson,  Thomas  Powell, 
Andrew  Tersck,  and  Henry  Delves  for  managing  the 
multiform  mechanics  of  the  stage  and  without  whose 
efficient  services  the  efforts  of  all  the  others,  includ- 
ing the  authors,  would  have  been  in  vain. 

iv. 


Note. 


ESPONSIBILITY  for  the  plot  of  this 
play  rests  with  Mr.  Field;  the  text 
is  Mr.  Garnett's.  Each,  however,  has 
of  course  made  suggestions  as  to  the 
work  of  the  other. 

The  fact  that  every  character  and 
every  incident  in  this  remarkable 
drama  is  taken  from  actual  life  should 
invest  it  with  peculiar  interest  for  those  who  are 
familiar  with  the  social  history  of  San  Francisco. 
Only  such  alterations  have  been  made  as  were 
rendered  necessary  by  the  exigencies  of  dramatic 
structure. 

"The  Lure  of  the  Traffic"  was  performed  for  the 
first  time  in  the  famous  Owl  Theatre  on  the  night  of 
January  3,  1914.  It  was  received  with  the  greatest 
enthusiasm  by  a  large  and  unrepresentative  audience. 
Many  of  the  city's  wealthiest  and  least  intelligent 
citizens  were  among  those  present.  The  following 
thoughtful  criticism,  which  appeared  in  one  of  the 
leading  newspapers  the  next  morning,  bears  witness 


to  the  profound  impression  which  the  great  moral 
lesson  of  this  vivid  and  sensational  uplift  drama 
made  upon  the  public  mind  and  conscience: 

This  horrid  but  necessary  play  mu.*>t  have  come 
to  those  Bohemians  who  witnessed  the  first  produc- 
tion with  an  appeal  as  powerful  as  it  must  have 
been  unwelcome.  The  course  of  the  drama  runs 
inexorably  down  the  ominous  history  of  Bohemia 
from  its  start  in  the  simple,  care-free  home  by  the 
Sacramento  river,  through  the  slightly  elaborated 
life  on  Pine  street,  through  the  complicated  changes 
at  Post  and  Grant  avenue,  through  the  artificial 
simplicity  amid  the  ruins  at  Post  and  Leavenworth, 
into  the  ornate  luxury  of  Post  and  Taylor.  Every- 
where through  the  scenes  of  the  play,  like  the 
winding  slime  which  marks  the  serpent's  trail, 
glistens  malevolently  the  track  of  that  intruder 
who  plots  to  cast  out  Music,  Art,  Letters  and  the 
Drama  and  to  substitute  for  them  the  essentially 
modern  device  of  the  motion  picture.  Not  even 
the  thrilling  denouement  which  discloses  the  whole 
thing  as  a  gregarious  [sic]  blunder,  serves  to  wholly 
or  in  part  rem-ove  the  depression  created  for  the 
thoughtful  witness  by  "The  Lure  of  the  Traffic." 
None  should  miss  it  though  many  are  sure  to. 

At  a  time  when  the  uses  and  abuses  of  white 
slavery  are  being  made  the  subject  of  so  many  ser- 
mons, novels,  and  plays,  it  is  inevitable  that  this 
drama  by  Messrs.  Field  and  Garnett  should  be  com- 
pared with  such  moralistic  works  as  ''Tiger,"  by 
Witter  Bynner;  "The  Chaser  and  the  Chaste,  or  Why 
Don't  Girls  Go  Wrong,"  by  C.  Beach;  "The  Necessary 
Evil,"  by  Charles  Rann  Kennedy;  "Manners  and 
Customs  of  College  Cadets  at  the  Beginning  of  the 
Twentieth  Century,"  by  Una  Versity;  and  "The 
Inside  of  the  Coop,"  by  Winston1  Churchill.  It  seems 
hardly  necessary  to  state,  however,  that  "The  Lure  of 

vi. 


the  Traffic,"  by  reason  of  its  high  seriousness,  its 
literary  charm,  and  its  scrupulous  adherence  to  truth, 
is  at  once  the  most  pertinent  and  the  most  dis- 
tinguished contribution  that  has  yet  been  made  to  a 
subject  in  which  every  healthy  person  should  be  more 
or  less  interested. 


Let  this  great  maxim  be  my  virtue's  guide; 
In  part  she  is  to  blame  that  has  been  tried — 
He  comes  too  near  that  comes  to  be  denied. 

LADY  MARY  WORTLEY  MONTAGU, 
The  Lady's  Resolve. 


BOHEMIA,  a  charming,  innocent  girl,  devoted  to  Music, 

Art,  Letters  and  the  Drama,  a  little  thoughtless 

and   self-willed,    but   with    true   instincts   in    the 

midst  of  constant  peril. 
SAM  Sisco,  her  father,  ivho  is  proud  of  his  daughter 

as  far  as  he\  understands  her  nature. 
CALLIE,   his  ivife,   mother  of  Bohemia,  still  shoiving 

traces  of  early  beauty  and  greatly  interested  in 

the  activities  of  the  Ladies'  Improvement  Club  of 

the  village. 
PHILIP   GOODFELLOW,    a  simple    rustic,     but     one     of 

Nature's    noblemen   and   accepted    sweetheart    of 

Bohemia. 
WYNOTT  OTHURS,  a  successful  business  man  from,  the 

city  whose  ethical  slogan  is  "All  the  traffic  will 

bear.'1 
MME.     NECESSITY,     a     procuress,     proprietress     of     a 

notorious  Motion  Picture  establishment,  or  house 

of  shame. 


LORELEY    MONTRIO,    a    fascinating    rag,    afterward     a 

street-walker. 
GROVER,  a  wood-cutter. 
MUSET,          \ 

LETTY  /  comPanions  °f  Bohemia. 

DRAM  M  AH, 

TOM,       \ 

DICK,  friends  of  Wynott  Othurs. 

HARRY,  j 

GENTLEMAN    FRANK,    president    of    the    Doorkeepers' 

Union. 

BILLY,  a  doorkeeper. 
MATTHEW,  another  doorkeeper. 
OFFICER  TOOLE,  a  fly  cop. 
JUDGE  SMITH,  a  Justice  of  the  Peace. 
MONSIEUR  JAY,  an  art  instructor. 
A  RESPECTABLE  CITIZEN. 
A  FIREMAN. 

MEMBERS  of  the  DOORKEEPERS'  UNION,  Creatures  of 
the  Night  Life,  Choir  boys.  Art  students,  and  all 
the  other  flotsam  and  jetsam  that  goes  to  make 
a  world  of  which  the  average  poor  girl  knows 
next  to  nothing. 


ishe  fjjJ2?affi& 


it  L 


SCENE  1. 

Sitting  room  of  the  Sisco  home  on  the  old  farm  by 
the  Sacramento.  The  furnishings  are  simple. 
There  is  a  table  near  center,  covered  with  a  red 
and  white  cloth.  On  the  table  are  an  oil  lamp,  a 
water  pitcher  and  glass,  a  work  basket  and  some 
books  and  magazines.  A  few  chairs  are  arranged 
around  the  room.  In  one  corner  stands  a  parlor 
organ,  in  the  other  a  book-case  full  of  books. 
There  are  doors  at  left  and  right  and  a  door  and 
window  at  the  back.  Through  the  latter,  which 
is  open,  a  rural  vista  may  be  seen  in  bright  sun- 
light. There  are  many  paintings  on  the  walls; 
they  are  bright  in  color  and  amateurish  in 
manner.  A  variegated  piece  of  crewel  work  is 
prominently  displayed.  It  bears  the  motto 
"BOHEMIA'S  HOME  IS  HERE."  CALLIE  is  dis- 
covered sitting  in  a  rocking-chair  near  the  table, 
rocking  and  knitting.  She  wears  the  simple  dress 
of  a  farmer's  wife,  with  ivhite  apron  and  cap. 
Her  hair  is  grey  and  she  wears  spectacles.  After 


THE     LURE     OF     THE     TRAFFIC 

the  curtain  rises  there  is  silence  for  an  appreci- 
able time  for  the  purpose  of  suggesting  an 
atmosphere  of  peace.  SAM  Sisco  appears  at  the 
window  and  looks  in.  He  wears  a  large  straw 
hat,  a  checked  cotton  shirt  and  overalls  with 
straps  over  the  shoulders.  He  carries  a  hoe. 

SAM 

(Wiping  his  brow  ivith  a  bandana}  You  look  cool 
in  thar,  Callie. 

CALLIE 

My!  Samuel,  how  you  startled  me!  You  made  me 
drap  a  stitch. 

[SAM  Sisco  laughs  and  leaving  window, 
comes  in  through  door  at  back.  He  leans 
the  hoe  against  the  outside  of  the  house. 

SAM 

(Continuing  to  mop  brow)  It's  powerful  hot  down 
in  the  field,  Callie.  I'm  all  het  up.  Seems  as  though 
ther  wuz  always  a  heep  o'  work  ter  be  did  'round  this 
'ere  farm,  though  I  'low  faint  so  bad  as  t'wuz  fore 
we  begun  t'  irrigate.  Si  Spink  told  me  as  how  he 
believes  thet  in  a  year  from  now  land  right  'round 
here'll  fetch  twelve  or  fourteen  dollars  an  acre. 

[Sits  down  and  pours  drink  of  water  from 
pitcher  on  table. 

CALLIE 

Gracious  me,  Samuel!  D'  you  s'pose  thet's  a  fact? 
Why,  if  'tis,  we  might  sell  a  ten-acre  piece  an'  go 


THE    LURE    OP    THE    TRAFFIC 

down  city  for  a  year  an'  give  little  Bohemia  a 
edgication.  Ever  since  I  heerd  Mrs.  Cultington  talk 
before  the  Ladies'  Improvement  Club  'pon  Speeritual 
Emancipation  Through  Art,  I  been  dreamin'  thet 
some  day  we  might  be  able  t'  give  thet  child  th' 
opportunities  she's  entitled  ter.  Why,  Samuel,  when 
I  seen  her  a-drarin'  out  them  pi'chers — specially  th' 
one  over  thar  of  the  heifer  standin'  by  th'  hay-rick — 
an'  when  I  hear  her  a-playin'  of  "The  Maiden's 
Prayer"  on  th'  autoharp  or  th'  organ,  an'  when  she 
read  me  her  composition  on  Th'  Old  Mill,  it  makes 
me  think  that  mebbe  she's  one  o'  them  wonderful 
geniuses  thet  don't  hev  t'  work,  an'  I  sez  t'  myself, 
"If  only  Samuel  an'  me  could  tek  her  down  city  an' 
git  somebody  for  t'  learn  her  how  t'  mek  beautiful 
pi'chers  like  th'  man  in  th'  booth  at  th'  county  fair, 
an'  t'  play  th'  pianny  an'  mebbe  t'  write  a  book  like 
E.  P.  Roe!"  Don't  you  think,  Samuel,  we  could  do  it 
for  th'  child  somehow? 

SAM 

'Pears  t'  me  as  how  you're  right,  Callie.  Bohemia 
oughter  have  a  chance  to  mek  something  of  herself. 
But  I  don't  know  as  how  th'  city's  a  good  place  for  a 
young  gal.  Not  that  Bohemia's  liable  to  stray  from 
th'  path  o'  virtue,  but  they  do  say  as  how  young  gals 
is  stolen  in  the  city  every  day  an'  me4  to  live  a  life 
o'  shame.  Thar's  a  hul  army  o'  villians  a-lyin'  in 
wait  fer  pure  innocent  gals  like  our  Bohemia.  I've 


THE    LURE    OF    THE    TRAFFIC 

heard  how  they  call  the  members  of  th'  army  cadets — 
sorter  soldiers  o'  fortune,  I  reckon.  They're  on  th' 
streets  an'  in  th'  hotels  an'  shops  an'  th'  clubs  is  plum 
full  of  'em. 

CALLIE 

Yes,  Samuel,  I  do  hear  of  them  things  thet  go  on 
down  city.  But  Mrs.  Carrie  Waite  who  spoke  before 
th'  Uplift  Circle  of  the  Ladies'  Improvement  Club  last 
week  sez  thet  the  women  f ol  k  of  the  city  has 
organized  a  crusade  agin  vice  and  is  agoin'  t'  reform 
all  the  cadets  an'  make  'em  over  inter  law-abidin'  n' 
God-fearin'  citizens.  She  sez  thet  this  awful  traffic 
in  the  maidenhood  of  America  must  stop!  I  believe, 
Samuel,  thet  since  th'  women  folk  has  took  hold  of 
public  morals  there  aint  no  danger  of  anything 
happenin'  to  Bohemia.  She  oughter  see  th'  world  an' 
hev  a  chance  to  improve  herself,  an'  then  she  could 
come  back  here  an'  marry  Philip. 

SAM 

Yes,  Callie,  Philip  Jd  mek  a  good  husband  for  our 
gal,  and  thar  aint  no  mistake  'bout  their  lovin'  one 
nother.  It  wuz  his  idee  to  git  up  this  'ere  moonlight 
picnic  tonight  down  in  the  little  grove  'long  side  th' 
irrigatin'  ditch  fer  to  celibrate  her  birthday.  Sixteen 
years,  Callie!  ^Why  it  don't  seem  no  time  since  you 
wuz  washin'  Bohemia's  didies.  (Knock  on  door) 
Come  in  . 


THE    LURE    OF    THE    TRAFFIC 


Enter  PHILIP  GOODFELLOW. 

[He  has  a  ruddy,  boyish  face  and  crisp,  curly 
blonde  hair.  He  wears  a  blue  flannel 
shirt,  open  very  wide  at  the  neck,  and 
trousers  tucked  into  high  boots.  His 
manner  is  a  combination  of  youthful 
embarrassment  and  manliness.  As  he 
enters  he  plucks  his  hat  from  his  head 
and  fumbles  with  it  as  he  grins  and  boivs 
jerkily  several  times. 

PHIL. 
How  'do  folks. 

SAM 

Hello,  Philip,  come  in.  We  were  jest  a-talkin' 
about  yer. 

CALLIE 

How  do  you  do,  Philip,  we're  very  glad  to  see  you. 
Won't  you  sit  down? 

PHIL. 

Thank  you.  Thank  you,  mum.  I  just  came  in 
to  ...  to  ...  is  ...  is  ...  is  Bohemia 
at  ...  at  home? 

CALLIE 
No,  Philip,  but  we  be  expectin'  of  her  any  minit. 


'Pears  to  me  as  how  y're  powerful  interested  in  our 
little  gal  these  days,  Philip.  (Laughs  tauntingly  but 
good  naturedly.) 


THE    LURE     OF    THE    TRAFFIC 

PHIL. 
Why  .   .   .   why  ...   I   ....    I    ...   we   ... 

SAM 

(Rising  and  putting  his  hand  on  PHILIP'S  shoulder) 
Never  mind,  my  boy,  some  day — some  day  perhaps 
you  will  be  our  son. 

[PHILIP  stiffens  his  shoulders  with  a  proud 
gaze  upward.  SAM  Sisco  raises  his  hand 
aloft,  speaking  solemnly. 

If  God  is  to  give  to  our  little  Bohemia  the  happiness 
of  a  good,  a  true,  a  noble  husband,  we  can  wish  for 
none  better,  for  none  more  worthy,  for  none  of  whom 
we  will  be  more  proud  than  Philip  Goodfellow. 

[SAM  Sisco  proffers  his  hand  which  PHILIP 
grasps  with  ooth  of  his,  striking  attitude. 
The  two  men  look  into  one  another's 
eyes. 

CALLIE 

(Fervently  as  she  rises  with  clasped  hands)  Oh, 
Samuel!  (To  PHILIP — placing  her  hands  on  his 
shoulders  and  resting  her  head  upon  his  expanded 
rliest)  Oh,  Philip! 

[PHILIP,  who  has  released  SAM  Sisco's  hand, 
stands  erect  with  one  arm  around 
CALLIE  and  the  other  held  stiffly  by  his 
side  in  soldierly  fashion.  Again  the 
proud  upward  look. 

6 


THE  LURE  OF  THE  TRAFFIC 

SAM 

Tell  us  about  the  picnic,  Philip.  And  what's  the 
news  ? 

PHIL. 

There  is  some  news.     There's   a  private  car  side- 
tracked  down   at  the  station.     It  belongs  to   a  man 
from  the  city  who  has  come  here,  so  they  say,  for  the 
purpose  of  investing  in  land. 
SAM 

Huh?  What's  that?  Why  Gallic  an'  me  wuz  jest 
talkin'  about  land.  I  wuz  a-tellin'  her  thet  I'd  be 
willin'  to  sell  th'  farm  fer  fifty  dollars  an  acre  an'  go 
down  city  fer  to  give  Bohemia  an'  edgication  in 
paintin'  an'  music  an'  sich. 

PHIL. 
(With  alarm)     Bohemia  going? 

[BOHEMIA  heard  singing  without:    "Weaving 
Spiders  Come  Not  Here"  etc. 

SAM 

Bohemia's  comin'.  Do  you  get  me?  Bohemia's  goin' 
an'  Bohemia's  comin'.  (Laughs.) 

PHIL. 
Yes,  I  get  Bohemia  coming  and  going. 

SAM 
Good.     Shshsh!    Not  a  word!     (They  shake  hands.) 

Enter  BOHEMIA. 
[She  wears  a  gingham  frock  and  sunbonnet, 


THE    LURE    OF    THE    TRAFFIC 


and  carries  a  bundle  of  books  on  the  end 
of  a  long  strap.  She  bursts  joyously 
through  the  door  and  skips  gaily  across 
the  room  to  kiss  CALLIE.  She  tosses  her 
books  to  one  side  as  she  runs.  After 
embracing  CALLIE  she  takes  her  two 
hands  and  stretches  them  wide  apart, 
drawing  them  together  again  playfully. 

BOHEMIA 
Oh,    mother,    I'm    so   happy! 

[Suddenly  seeing  PHILIP,  she  puts  her  hands 
on    each    skirt    of    her    sunbonnet    and, 
pressing  them  against  her  face,   blushes 
furiously. 
(Shyly)    How  do  you  do? 

[She  takes  off  sunbonnet  and  picking  up 
books  deposits  them  on  chair  in  corner. 
SAM  Sisco  observing  BOHEMIA'S  embar- 
rassment looks  knowingly  at  PHILIP. 

CALLIE 

What  is  it,  my  lamb!  What  is  it  that  makes  my 
lamb  so  happy  today? 

BOHEMIA 

Oh,  mother,  I  know  my  birthday  picnic  in  the  little 
grove  is  going  to  be  perfectly  wonderful!  Muset, 
Artie,  Letty  and  Drammah  have  got  a  surprise  for  me. 
(Clasps  her  hands  and  jumps  up  and  down)  Oh,  I'm 
so  happy.  All  the  girls  are  going  to  be  here  in  a 


THE    LURE    OF    THE    TRAFFIC 


minute  to  help  to  make  sandwiches.    Won't  it  be  fun? 

PHIL. 

(In  easy  attitude  with  head  on  one  side  and  in  deep 
rich  tones)  May  I  help  too,  Bohemia? 

BOHEMIA 
Why,  yes,  Phil,  if  you  wish  to. 

PHIL. 
I  always  wish  to  help  you,  Bohemia. 

[Bound  of  laughter  without. 
BOHEMIA 
Here  come  the  girls  now. 

[BOHEMIA  runs  to  door  and  throws  it  open. 
Standing  just  outside  the  door  she  jumps 
up  and  down  and  waves  her  hand  to 
those  who  approach. 

Enter,  skipping,  MUSET,  ARTIE  and  LETTY, 
and  after  them,  but  more  sedately, 
DRAMMAH. 

[BOHEMIA  goes  from  one  to  another  and 
kisses  each.  There  is  a  general  chatter- 
ing of  "Howdy  do,  howdy  do."  SAM 
Sisco  throws  up  his  hands  at  the  hubbub 
and  retires  to  one  side  of  the  room. 
PHILIP  also  moves  aside.  MUSET,  im- 
mediately after  kissing  BOHEMIA,  runs  to 
organ  and  begins  to  play.  ARTIE  makes 
a  caricature  of  SAM  Sisco.  LETTY  sits 
down  in  front  of  bookcase  and  begins 


THE    LURE    OF    THE    TRAFFIC 


pulling  down  and  examining  books. 
DRAM  M AH  greets  CALLIE,  SAM  Sisco,  and 
PHILIP  with  extravagant  theatricalism. 

DRAM  M  AH 

Ah,  dear  Bohemia's  mother,  dear  to  all  her  com- 
pany-yons,  and  most  dear  to  muh.  (Aside)  I  wonder 
does  she  wot  the  business  of  the  night.  (To  SAM 
Sisco)  Good  morrow,  sir,  this  is  inverideed  felicity. 
Ah,  Philip,  'tis  long  since  last  we  met.  I  greet  you. 
( Courtesies ) . 

[DRAMMAH  and  PHILIP  converse.  She  stands 
very  close  to  him  and  coquettishly  plays 
with  his  hair.  BOHEMIA  observes  this 
and  is  seen  to  bite  her  lips  and  clench 
her  hands  in  rage. 

MUSET 
(From  the  organ)  Oh,  girls,  let's  have  a  song. 

BOHEMIA 
Oh  yes.     Do,  do! 

[SAM  Sisco  throws  up  his  hands  and  goes  out. 
ARTIE,  LETTY,  DRAMMAH  and  BOHEMIA 
standing  round  MUSET  at  the  organ  sing 
"Jingle  Bells" 

CALLIE 

Now,  girls,  remember  thet  there's  work  ter  be  done. 
Come  inter  th'  kitchen  with  me  an'  we'll  mek  th' 
sandwiches. 

[Cries  from  the  girls  of  "All  right,  all  right. 

10 


THE    LURE    OP    THE    TRAFFIC 


Come  on,  come  on,"  etc.  CALLIE  goes  out 
left,  followed  by  the  girls  crowding 
through  the  door  noisily.  BOHEMIA  starts 
after  them.  The  door  is  closed  before  she 
reaches  it,  shutting  out  the  noise.  Silence 
for  an  appreciable  period. 

PHIL. 
(Leaning  over  back  of  chair  at  table)    Heemie. 

BOHEMIA 
(Proudly)  Yes? 

PHIL. 

Won't  you  stay  here  a  little  while?  I  have  some- 
thing1 to  say  to  you. 

BOHEMfA 

Oh,  indeed?   And  may  I  ask  what  it  is? 

PHIL. 
Sit  down  here,  Heemie,  and  let  me  tell  you. 

[BOHEMIA  goes  to  chair  and  sits  down  stiffly 
with  her  hands  in  her  lap.  She  'frowns 
and  taps  her  foot  with  evident  irritation. 

Heemie.  This  is  your  birthday.  You  are  happy  today. 
(Coming  round  in  front  of  BOHEMIA)  Won't  you 
make  me  happy  too?  I  love  you,  Heemie.  (PHILIP 
makes  to  take  BOHEMIA'S  hand  but  she  flings  his 
hand  from  her.  PHILIP  recoils.)  Why,  Heemie,  dear, 
I  don't  understand.  ( Throwing  himself  on  his  knees 
before  her.)  Listen,  sweetheart!  You  must  listen  to 
me!  I  love  you! 

11 


THE    LURE    OF    THE    TRAFFIC 

BOHEMIA 

(Rising)  Stop!  How  dare  you  speak  of  love  to 
muh?  You  who  but  a  moment  ago,  in  this  very  room, 
before  my  very  eyes,  showed  only  too  plainly  that 
you  love  another! 

PHIL. 

But,  Heemie,  I  ...  I  ...  you  know  .  .  .you 
must  know!  .  .  . 

BOHEMIA 

Not  another  word!  I  know  you  now,  Philip  Good- 
fellow,  for  what  you  really  are.  You  have  trifled  with 
my  innocent  affections.  (She  sobs)  You  have  broken 
my  heart! 

[BOHEMIA  walks  up  and  down  stage  front 
wringing  her  hands  above  her  head  and 
placing  the  backs  of  them  upon  her 
upturned  brow. 

Ah,  God!  Is  there  no  one  who  I  can  trust — I  mean, 
whom  I  can  trust?  Ah,  God!  God!  God! 

[PHILIP  approaches  BOHEMIA  and  tries  to 
take  her  in  his  arms. 

BOHEMIA 

(With  what  is  almost  a  screech)  Don't  touch  me! 
I  hate  you!  I  hate  you!  I  hate  you!  (Pointing  to 
door)  Go!  (Stamps  her  foot)  Go,  I  say! 

PHIL. 
(Coldly)    Very  well.     I   will  go.     (Picking  up   hat 

12 


THE    LURE    OF    THE    TRAFFIC 


and  going  to  door)    I  go,  and    I    shall    not    return. 
(Putting  on  his  hat)    Farewell. 

[.Goes  out  slamming  door  behind  him. 
[BOHEMIA  stands  staring  at  the  door.     Her 
clenched    hand    trembles  at    her  mouth. 
There  is  a  wild  look  in  her  eyes. 

BOHEMIA 
Oh,  what  have  I  done!    What  have  I  DONE! 

[She  turns  around  three  times  with  her  eyes 
closed  and  falls  in  a  swoon. 


SCENE  2. 

The  truck  garden  of  the  Sisco  home.  A  low  fence 
runs  across  the  stage  at  back.  BOHEMIA  is  dis- 
covered picking  lettuce.  She  has  a  basket  beside 
her.  Her  eyes  are  red  with  weeping. 

Enter  WYNOTT  OTHURS. 

He  has  a  black  mustache  and  dark  circles  under  his 
eyes.  He  wears  a  Norfolk  jacket,  knickerbockers 
and  puttee  leggings,  a  white  stock,  heavy  light- 
colored  gloves  with  the  skirts  turned  back  and  a 
velvet  hat  on  the  side  of  which  is  a  small  red 
feather.  He  carries  a  very  thin  flexible  cane  and 

13 


THE    LURE     OF    THE    TRAFFIC 

smokes  a  cigarette  in  a  long  amber  holder. 
OTHURS  sees  BOHEMIA,  ivJiose  back  is  turned 
toward  him.  He  pauses,  emits  a  puff  of  smoke 
and  nods  wisely,  then,  approaching  the  fence,  he 
leans  gracefully  upon  it  and  coughs,  at  the  same 
time  taking  a  handkerchief  from  his  cuff  and 
touching  his  lips  lightly  with  it.  As  BOHEMIA 
turns  ivithout  rising  OTHURS  lifts  his  hat  showing 
his  black  hair  brushed  straight  back  without  a 
part. 

OTHURS 

I  beg  your  pardon,  but  can  you  direct  me  to  the 
residence  of  Mr.  Sam  Sisco? 

BOHEMIA 

(Rising  and  straightening  her  apron}  Why,  this  is 
it.  He  is  m'  father. 

OTHURS 

(Tapping  flowers  with  cane}  Ah!  And  may  I  ask 
your  name? 

BOHEMIA 
My  name  is  Bohemia. 

OTHURS 

The  name  is  no  less  charming  than  its  owner.  May 
I  come  in?  I  have  some  business  to  talk  over  with 
your  father. 

[OTHURS  vaults   the  fence   lightly.    BOHEMIA 
drops  a  head  of  lettuce.   OTHURS  picks  it 

14 


THE    LURE    OF    THE    TRAFFIC 

up  and  dropping  on  one  knee  hands  it  to 
her  with  his  head  uncovered.  As  he  rises 
BOHEMIA  plays  with  the  head  of  lettuce 
and  casts  shy  side-long  glances  at  OTHURS. 

Pardon  me  if  I  presume  on  such  a  slight  acquaintance 
to  remark  that  the  serenity  of  your  countenance  is 
disturbed  as  if  by  some  trouble — some  sorrow  per- 
chance— which  you  are  bravely  trying  to  conceal. 
Surely  I  have  found  beauty,  but  beauty  in  distress.  I 
wish  that  I  might  say  the  word  that  would  lift  this 
burden  from  your  heart.  You  are  too  young  to  be 
unhappy.  (Aside,  showing  teeth)  The  Movie  House 
for  her.  It  must  be  so! 

BOHEMIA 

Alas,  kind  sir,  what  you  suspect  is  but  too  true. 
One  whom  I  thought  a  paragon  among  men  has 
cruelly  deceived  me,  and  at  this  moment  I  am  the 
most  miserable  girl  in  the  world!  (She  weeps). 

OTHURS 

Ah,  dry  those  tears,  Bohemia.  Can  you  not  trust 
me?  Do  so  and  all  will  yet  be  well. 

BOHEMIA 

(Drying  her  eyes  with  hem  of  apron)  Thank  you, 
sir,  for'  those  kind  words.  I  am  only  a  poor  country 
girl,  untutored  in  the  ways  of  the  world,  but  some- 
thing tells  me — something  here  tells  me  that  you  are 
good  and  noble. 

15 


THE    LURE    OP    THE    TRAFFIC 


OTHURS 

(With  deprecating  gesture)  You  flatter  me.  Thai 
which  you  call  goodness  and  nobility  consists  of  not 
forgetting  that  one  is — a  gentleman.  I  never  forget 
that,  and  I  never  shall.  My  mother  taught  me  to  be 
honest  and  upright  and  I  have  always  remembered 
the  lesson  I  learned  at  her  knee. 

[BOHEMIA  looks  at  OTHURS  rapturously. 

Enter  SAM  Sisco. 

BOHEMIA 

Oh,  father,  here's  a  gentleman  to  see  you  on  busi- 
ness. Mr.  ...  by  the  way,  you  haven't  told  me 
your  name. 

OTHURS 
My  name  is  Othurs,  Wynott  Othurs,  at  your  service. 

BOHEMIA 
Mr.  Othurs,  this  is  m'  father. 

SAM 
I'm  proud  ter  meet  yer. 

OTHURS 

I  am  here,  Mr.  Sisco,  for  the  purpose  of  buying 
land.  This  farm  of  yours  has  attracted  me  and  I 
should  like  to  acquire  it. 

SAM 

Come  right  inter  th'  house,  mister,  an'  let's  talk 
business. 

[SAM  Sisco  and  OTHURS  enter  the  house.    As 

16 


THE    LURE    OF    THE    TRAFFIC 


he  exits  OTHUBS  lifts  His  hat  with  a 
splendid  gesture  and  smiles  at  BOHEMIA, 
who  smiles  l)ack,  coyly  twisting  the 
strings  of  her  apron.  When  she  is  alone 
she  picks  up  a  cabbage  and  begins  pluck- 
ing the  leaves  from  it,  saying  as  she  does 
so,  "He  loves  me,  he  loves  me  not"  etc. 
Finally  she  tears  the  cabbage  in  handfuls 
and  with  a  last  hysterical  "HE  LOVES 
ME!"  she  flings  the  remainder  of  it  in  the 
air  and  falls  on  her  knees  with  clasped 
hands. 

BOHEMIA 
(Wildly  happy)  Thank  God!    Thank  God! 


SCENE  3. 

In  the  woods.  At  one  side  there  is  a  log  lying  on  the 
ground.  The  song  of  birds  is  heard. 

Enter  PHILIP  GOODFELLOW. 

He  walks  slowly  and  dejectedly  to  the  log  and  sits 
down  upon  it  listlessly,  his  hands  hanging  limply 
over  his  knees.  He  nods  his  head  contemplatively 
as  he  speaks. 

17 


THE    LURE    OF    THE    TRAFFIC 

PHIL. 
There's  nothing  left  for  me  to  do  but  to  die. 

[He   buries  his  face  in  his   hands  and  sobs 

convulsively. 
O,  Heemie,  Heemie,  I  cannot  live  without  you. 

[He  continues  to  weep  for  a  while,  then  put- 
ting his  hand  in  the  breast  of  his  shirt 
he  draws  forth  a  tintype  in  a  slip-case  of 
pink  paper.  He  holds  it  in  front  of  him 
with  one  hand  and  with  the  other  wipes 
his  eyes  with  a  blue  and  white  polka-dot 
handkerchief. 

You  made  me  love  you.  ...  I  didn't  want  to  do  it. 
....  You  made  me  want  you  .  .  .  And  all  the  time 
you  knew  it.  ...  You  made  me  happy.  .  .  .  Some- 
times you  made  me  sad  .  .  .  And  now,  Bohemia, 
you've  made  me  feel  so  bad.  (He  weeps.) 

[This  speech  is  delivered  with  an  entire 
absence  of  rhythm  and  is  accompanied 
by  an  interrupted  violin  obligato  in  the 
orchestra. 

(With  sudden  resolution)  But  why  should  I  care? 
(Standing  up  quickly)  I  am  nothing  to  her.  Hard  as  it 
is  I  must  pluck  her  memory  from  m'  heart.  (He  makes 
as  if  to  throw  away  tintype,  but  checks  himself)  But 
no!  It  shall  never  be  said  that  Philip  Goodfellow 
acted  the  cad.  (Looking  at  picture)  Some  day  you 
may  repent  your  harsh  words,  Bohemia.  Until  that 

18 


THE    LURE     OP    THE    TRAFFIC 

time  comes  it  is  m'  duty  to  watch  over  you.  Some- 
thing tells  me  that  I  should  be  near  your  side  tonight, 
but  after  what  has  passed  between  us,  how  can  I  join 
the  festal  throng?  And  yet  this  horrible  presenti- 
ment will  not  down.  Bohemia  needs  muh.  I'll  go! 
I'll  GO!  [.Runs  off. 


SCENE  4. 
The  sitting  room  of  the  Sisco  farmhouse. 

Enter  SAM  Sisco  and  WYNOTT  OTHURS. 

SAM 

Waal,  stranger,  so  you've  tuk  a  shine  ter  this  'ere 
farm,  eh? 

OTHURS 

Yes,  Mr.  Sisco,  so  much  so  that  I  wish  to  purchase 
it.  What  is  your  price? 

SAM 

Waal,  seein'  as  how  land  here'bouts  is  on  th'  rise, 
'pears  ter  me  thet  something  long  'bout  hundred 
dollars  an  acre  er  four  thousand  dollars  fer  th'  hul 
forty  'd  be  'bout  right. 

19 


THE    LURE    OP    THE    TRAFFIC 

OTHURS 

(Taking  roll  of  Mils  from  pocket}  I'll  give  you 
two  thousand  and  take  a  mortgage. 

SAM 

(Scratching  head)  Let's  see:  You  tek  th'  mortgage 
for  the  other  two  thousand? 

OTHURS 

Yes.  I  am  perfectly  willing  to  do  so.  The  mortgage 
can  stand  as  long  as  you  wish  and  I'll  let  you  off  with 
only  ten  per  cent  interest.  It  isn't  strictly  business,  but 
there's  sentiment  in  this.  I  love  the  country! 

SAM 

Gee,  whiz!  I  call  thet  a  pretty  good  deal.  But  the 
old  place's  wuth  it! 

OTHURS 

(Counting  Mils  while  SAM  Sisco  suppresses  a  con- 
vulsion} There  you  are,  Mr.  Sisco. 

SAM 

Much  obleeged,  stranger,  thet  suits  me.  Excuse  me 
while  I  go  an'  fetch  Callie. 

OTHURS 
May  I  smoke?    (Takes  out  gold  cigarette  case.} 

SAM 
Y'kin  spit  on  th'  new  carpit  if  y'  hev  a  mind  ter. 

OTHURS 

(Lighting  cigarette  with  patent  lighter.}    Thanks. 

[SAM  goes  out, 


THE    LURE     OF    THE    TRAFFIC 


Ah — ha!  The  old  fool's  in  m'  clutches.  The  first  step 
is  already  won.  Now  to  persuade  him  to  take  his 
daughter  to  the  city.  Once  there  and  the  rest  will  be 
easy.  (Rubs  hands  and  shows  teeth)  Mother  Neces- 
sity must  be  notified  at  once  that  I  have  found  a 
recruit  for  her  Movie  House.  Ah — ha,  m'  little 
beauty,  y'  little  know  the  fate  in  store  for  you.  The 
Movie  House!  Ah — ha!  .  .  .  But  here  they  come. 
I  must  dissemble. 

[Takes  position  in  front  of  the  picture  of  a 
heifer;  enter  SAM  Sisco  and  CALLIE.  The 
latter  smoothes  her  hair  and  her  apron. 

SAM 
Callie,  shake  hands  with  Mr.  Othurs. 

[CALLIE  shakes  hands  with  OTHURS,  bobbing 
as  she  does  so. 

OTHURS 
This  is  a  great  honor,  madame. 

CALLIE 

So  you've  tuk  a  mortgage  on  th'  farm,  eh?  Well 
I'm  so  flusterated  I  don't  know  what  ter  do.  Samuel 
jest  told  me  as  how  you'd  given  him  a  thousand  dol- 
lars. It's  a  blessin'  to  us  an'  to  our  little  Bohemia. 
Seems  as  though  Heaven  must  a'  heard  my  prayers. 

SAM 

We're  agoin'  to  tek  that  thousand  dollars  (Winks 
at  OTHURS)  an'  tek  our  little  Bohemia  down  city  whar 

21 


THE    LURE     OF    THE    TRAFFIC 


she  kin  git  edgicated  in  art.     I  seen  you  lookin'  at 
one  of  her  pi'chers  thar,  aint  it  a  hum-dinger? 
OTHURS 

(Aside)  To  the  city.  Ha!  Fortune  favors  us.  (To 
SAM  Sisco  and  CALLIE)  It  is  a  charming  bit.  Your 
daughter  evidently  has  exceptional  talent.  (Aside) 
What  luck!  Bohemia  in  a  Movie  House  will  make 
our  fortune.  (To  SAM  and  CALLIE)  I  have  influential 
friends  among  artistic  circles  in  the  city.  You  see 
I  buy  a  great  many  pictures.  'Tis  m'  fahncy  to 
collect  such  trifles.  I  will  see  to  it  that  your  daughter 
has  an  advantageous  introduction. 
CALLIE 

I  will  call  her  an'  tell  her  the  good  news.  (Going  to 
door  and  opening  it)  Bohe-e-eem-ya!  Bohe-e-e-eem-ya! 
Bohe-e-eem-ya! 

Enter  BOHEMIA  with  basket. 

BOHEMIA 
(At  door)    Here  I  am,  mother. 

CALLIE 
Mr.  Othurs  here  has  got  a  mortgage  on  th'  farm. 

BOHEMIA 

(With  pathos.    Dropping  basket)    The  old  farm  gone! 
[BOHEMIA  walks  slowly  fonvard  with  bowed 
head. 

SAM 
Yes,  Bohemia,  I  mortgaged  th'  farm  so  you  cud  go 

22 


THE    LURE    OF    THE    TRAFFIC 

down  city  an'  larn  how  ter  paint  and  play  the  pianny 
an'  write  stories  an'  pomes. 

BOHEMIA 

Oh,  father,  is  it  really  true? 
SAM    . 

Yes,  it's  true,  an'  what's  more,  Mr.  Othurs  is  a-goin' 
ter  fix  it  fer  you  ter  git  th'  best  entry  inter  artistic 
an'  litry  sassiety. 

BOHEMIA 

(Going  to  OTHUBS  and  taking  his  hand  in  both  of 
hers,  effusively)  Oh,  Mr.  Othurs,  how  can  I  ever 
thank  you? 

OTHURS 
(Deprecatingly)    It  is  nothing — nothing  at  all. 

BOHEMIA 

Oh,  but  it  is,  it  is!   I  want  to  do  something  for  you 
— something  to  show  my  appreciation.    (With  sudden 
inspiration)    Oh,  I  have  it!    Come  to  my  picnic.    Oh, 
you  must  come,  you  must  come!    Today  is  my  birth- 
day and   they're   going   to   have   a   moonlight   picnic 
for   me   down   in   the   little   grove   by   the   irrigation 
ditch.    The  girls  have  got  a  surprise  for  me  and  it's 
going  to  be  perfectly  glorious! 
OTHURS 
Nothing  would  give  me  greater  pleasure. 

BOHEMIA 

(Jumping  up  and  down  and  clapping  her  hands) 
Oh,  goody,  goody,  goody! 

23 


THE    LURE    OF    THE    TRAFFIC 


OTHURS 

Would  it  be  presuming  if  I  should  ask  -you  to 
invite  some  friends  of  mine.  I'm  sure  you'll  like 
Tom,  Dick,  and  Harry. 

BOHEMIA 
Oh,  yes,  indeed,  the  more  the  merrier. 

[The    heads    of    MUSET,    ARTIE,    LETTY    and 
DRAMMAH   are   seen   peeping    in   at    the 
window. 
Oh,  there  are  the  girls  now. 

[The  heads  disappear.  BOHEMIA  goes  out  at 
door  and  comes  back  herding  the  girls 
into  the  room.  MUSET,  ARTIE  and  LETTY 
hang  back  exhibiting  diffidence,  DRAM- 
MAH is  bolder  than  the  rest  and  stepping 
forward  eyes  OTHURS  smilingly  from 
head  to  foot. 

BOHEMIA 
These  are  my  little  school  friends,  the  Humanities, 

Muset,  Artie,  Letty  and Drammah.    We  have  all 

the  talent  of  the  school  right  here. 

[As  they  are  introduced,  MUSET,  ARTIE  and 
LETTY  bob  a  courtesy.  BOHEMIA  gives 
her  head  a  disdainful  toss  when  she 
introduces  DRAMMAH,  who  steps  up  to 
OTHURS  and  shakes  hands  with  him, 
their  hands  on  a  level  with  their  eyes. 

24 


THE    LURE    OP    THE    TRAFFIC 

Mr.  Othurs  is  coming  to  the  picnic  tonight  and  he's 
going  to  bring  some  of  his  friends. 

MUSET,  ARTIE  AND  LETTY 
How  fine!     That'll  be  jolly.     Oh,  lovely! 

DRAM  M  AH 
Your  promised  presence  fills  muh  with  delight-ah. 

BOHEMIA 

And  girls!  What  do  you  suppose?  Papa  has  sold 
the  farm  to  Mr.  Othurs  and  I'm  going  to  the  city  to 
study  art  and  music  and  everything. 

[Chorus  of  Oh!   Oh!   Oh!  from  the  girls. 

OTHURS 

(Aside)  More  chickens  to  be  dressed.  (Taking  out 
roll  of  bills  and  tapping  his  hand  with  it)  Well,  I  can 
dress  'em.  (To  CALLIE)  Madame,  I  must  take  m'  leave. 
Good-by,  Mr.  Sisco.  And  to  you,  ladies,  au  revoir.  I 
shall  see  you  all  tonight.  (Goes  to  door  accompanied 
by  BOHEMIA)  Till  tonight  then? 

BOHEMIA 
Good-by  Mr.    .    .    .    Othurs. 

OTHURS 
Why  not  Wynott? 

BOHEMIA 
Yes,  why  not? 

OTHURS 
Say  it,  Bohemia. 

25 


ACT  I,  Scene  4. 

PHILIP    TO   THE    RESCUE. 

"Thank  God,  I  arrived  in  time!' 


THE    LURE    OP    THE    TRAFFIC 

BOHEMIA 
Wynott,  good-by  Wynott.  [OTHURS  goes  out. 

[The  girls  who  have  gathered  around  MUSET 
at  the  organ  begin  to  sing.  BOHEMIA 
goes  to  window  and  looks  out,  craning 
her  neck  in  an  effort  to  follow  OTHURS 
with  her  eyes.  She  leans  farther  and 
farther  out  of  the  window,  until  it 
becomes  possible  for  the  leader  of  the 
orchestra,  if  he  wishes,  to  see  her  garters. 
In  her  eagerness  she  finally  loses  her 
balance  and  with  a  piercing  scream  falls 
out  of  the  window  with  an  undecorous 
display  of  hosiery,  lingerie,  etc. 

CALLIE 

(With  alarm)    What  has  happened,  Sam?   Bohemia 
must  have  let  her  foot  slip. 

[PHILIP  GOODFELLOW  suddenly  appears  at  the 
window  and  is  seen  to  stoop  down  and 
pick  BOHEMIA  up  in  his  arms.  He  carries 
her  into  the  house  and  laying  her  on  the 
floor  kneels  beside  her.  CALLIE  also 
kneels  and  chafes  BOHEMIA'S  hands.  SAM 
Sisco  and  the  girls  hover  helplessly  about. 

PHIL. 
Thank  God,  I  arrived  in  time! 

27 


THE    LURE    OF    THE    TRAFFIC 

BOHEMIA 

(Opening  her  eyes,  wonderingly)  I  ...  will  .  .  . 
be  ...  yours  .  .  .  Wynott  .  .  ,  tonight  .  .  . 
Wynott.  ( Swoons ) . 

PHIL. 

Mine!  Tonight!  Why  not  tonight!  Ah,  Heaven 
be  praised!  She  loves  me!  I  am  forgiven! 


CURTAIN 


A.  grove,  at  night.  At  the  back  of  the  scene  a  hill- 
side covered  with  trees.  At  the  foot  of  the  hill 
there  is  a  slight  elevation  forming  a  natural 
stage.  This  is  screened  at  the  sides  with  foliage. 
On  one  side  a  rude  seat  made  from  a  great  log. 
A  fire  is  burning  at  center. 

[Enter  GROVER  followed  by  PHILIP.  They 
carry  firewood  which  they  place  on  fire. 
GROVER  lights  gasoline  flambeau  hanging 
on  tree. 

GROVER 

These   damn   picnics   make   me   tired!      Any   one'd 
suppose  the  grove  was  made  for  picnics. 
PHIL. 

Oh,  quit  your  kicking,  Grover!  You're  an  old 
grouch,  that's  what  you  are!  (He  turns  on  water 
faucet  at  left,  but  no  water  comes.)  Look  here,  what's 
the  matter  with  the  water?  We've  spent  a  lot  of 
money  putting  in  this  pipe  on  your  assurance  that 
we'd  always  have  water  for  our  picnics.  Now  it's  up 

29 


THE    LURE    OP    THE    TRAFFIC 

to  you  to  see  that  we  get  it.     If  this  sort  of  thing 
keeps  up  I'll  have  you  fired,  understand? 

GROVER 

What,  no  water  again?  It  must  have  seeped 
through  at  the  spring.  Just  wait  a  minute.  I  can 
dig  it  out.  (Goes  to  one  side,  picking  up  shovel  and 
begins  to  dig  viciously.)  Hell!  (Digs)  No  water! 
(digs)  Nothing  but  kick,  kick,  kick!  (digs)  Can't 
seem  to  satisfy  some  people! 

[A  muddy  stream  flows  from  faucet.    PHILIP 

catches  it  in  a  glass. 

There!  There's  your  water.  Now  maybe  you'll  quit 
kicking  for  a  while. 

PHIL. 
Water?    Why  this  is  nothing  but  blue  mud. 

GROVER 

There  you  go!  There  you  go!  Say,  sonny,  if  you 
don't  like  the  way  I  do  things,  why  don't  you  get 
somebody  else? 

PHIL. 
That's  the  most  sensible  thing  you've  said  yet. 

Enter  SAM  Sisco,  CALLIE,  BOHEMIA,  MUSET, 
ARTIE,  LETTY  and  DRAMMAH,  carrying 
baskets  which  they  deposit  on  ground. 

CALLIE 
Howdy  do,  Philip.    Howdy  do,  Mr.  Grover. 

[GROVER  grunts. 

30 


THE    LURE    OP    THE    TRAFFIC 

SAM 
Howdy,  howdy. 

PHIL. 
Howdy  do.     (To  BOHEMIA)     Good  evening. 

[BOHEMIA  tosses  head  and  turns  her  back  on 
PHILIP.  Sound  of  locomotive  whistle  and 
bell,  and  rattle  of  car. 

Enter  WY.NOTT  OTHUES,  TOM,  DICK  and  HARRY. 

[They  carry  flowers  and  candy  and  are  fol- 
lowed by  six  servants  in  livery  carrying 
many  elaborate  pieces  of  luggage  and  a 
small  striped  tent  which  they  proceed  to 
erect  and  deck  with  electric  lights  of 
various  colors. 

OTHURS 

Ah,  there  you  are!  (Presents  floivers  and  candy  to 
BOHEMIA)  Permit  me  to  introduce  my  friends.  Miss 
Sisco,  this  is  Mr.  Tom  Policy,  this,  is  Mr.  Dick  Ticker 
and  this  is  Mr.  Harry  Rolingstock. 

BOHEMIA 

I  am  delighted  to  meet  friends  of  Mr.  Othurs.  Let 
me  in  turn  present  my  friends,  the  Humanities,  Miss 
Muset,  Miss  Artie,  Miss  Letty,  Mr.  Policy,  Mr.  Ticker, 
Mr.  Rolingstock. 

DRAMMAH 

(Stepping  forward)  (Aside,  in  direction  of 
BOHEMIA)  Minx!  (To  the  others)  Gentlemen,  allow 

31 


THE    LURE    OF    THE    TRAFFIC 

me  to  introduce  myself.  I  also  am  one  of  the  Huma- 
nities, although  Miss  Sisco  seems  to  have  forgotten  it. 
I  am  Miss  Drammah. 

TOM 

(To  all.  Presenting  flowers  to  DRAMMAH)  Charmed, 
I'm  sure.  (He  takes  DRAMMAH  aside). 

DICK 

(To  all.  Presenting  flowers  to  MUSET)  Delighted! 
(He  takes  MUSET). 

HARRY 

(To  all.  Presenting  flowers  to  ARTIE)  Jolly  glad! 
Jolly  glad!  (He  takes  ARTIE  aside). 

LETTY 

(Ready  to  cry)  Nobody's  nice  to  me.  I  do  all  I  can 
to  make  people  have  a  good  time,  and  the  other 
girls  get  all  the  attention. 

GROVER 
That's  what  you  get  for  being  a  highbrow. 

LETTY 

Highbrow  or  no  highbrow,  if  it  wasn't  for  me  there 
wouldn't  be  any  picnic  or  any  play.  (Interrupts  Tier- 
self.  Aside)  I  almost  let  the  secret  out. 

[During  this  SAM  Sisco,  CALLIE  and  BOHEMIA 
have  been  laying  a  tablecloth  on  the 
ground  and  preparing  the  meal.  PHIL 
goes  out  and  returns  with  wood.  OTHURS 
superintends  the  erection  of  the  tent. 
He  is  joined  presently  by  TOM,  DICK  and 

32 


THE    LURE    OF    THE    TRAFFIC 


HARRY.     The  girls  join   the  rest  of   the 
party.     GROVER  sits  on  a  bench  moodily. 

TOM 

Say,  Wynott,  what  sort  of  a  rummy  bunch  have 
you  steered  us  up  against?  These  squabs  have  no  pep. 

DICK 

Well  I  should  say  not.  Why  I  can  pick  up  a  floozie 
down  at  Skate's  any  time  that  can  run  circles 
around  'em. 

HARRY 

Rotten  crowd,  old  top,  simply  rotten.  Rotten  place, 
anyhow.  Thank  God  we  don't  have  to  mix  with  them! 

TOM 

Come  on.  Let's  get  out  of  this.  Let's  go  where 
we  can  be  comfortable. 

DICK 
You're  on. 

HARRY 
Aw  yes,  by  Jove! 

[They   enter   tent,   accompanied   by   OTHURS 

BOHEMIA 

There.   Everything's  ready.    Father,  blow  the  horn. 
\_They    all    sit    around    spread.     SAM   Sisco 
blows  horn  three  times.    A  pause. 

I  wonder  why  Mr.  Othurs  and  the  others  don't  come. 
(Rising  and  going  to  tent.)  (Shyly)  Gentlemen, 
supper  is  ready. 

35 


THE    LURE    OF    THE    TRAFFIC 

VOICE 
(From  tent)    Can  you  open  it? 

BOHEMIA 

(Returning  to  group  and  sitting  down)    They  must 
be  getting  some  sardines  ready. 

[The  party  round  the  spread  attacks  the  food 
and  eats  silently.  The  sound  of  poker 
chips  is  heard  from  tent,  and  voices  are 
heard  to  say*  at  intervals — "How  many?" 
"Give  me  three"  "Two"  "What  do  you 
do?'1  "Twenty."  "Twenty  more"  "1 
pass"  "And  twenty"  "Forty  raised." 
"And  fifty."  "I  see  you"  "What  y'got?" 
"Four  ladies"  "Too  good." 

[A  servant  enters  tent  with  bucket  of 
champagne.  Presently  the  sound  of  a 
cork  is  heard. 

VOICE 
(From  tent)    Throw  that  into  your  neck. 

2ND  VOICE 
(From  tent)    Here's  to  Bohemia. 

SRD  VOICE 

(From  tent)    Oh,  to  hell  with  Bohemia.     Here's  to 
Madame  Necessity.     (Cries  of  "Hear!    Hear!") 

4TH  VOICE 

(From  tent)    And  here's  to  Loreley  Montrio.    (Loud 
cries  of  "Hear!  Hear!") 

34 


THE  LURE  OF  THE  TRAFFIC 


SAM 

(Standing  up)  Ladies.  This  'ere  night  is  the 
greatest  night  in  all  th'  year  fer  Bohemia. 

[MUSET,  ARTIE,  DRAM M AH  and  PHILIP  get  up 
and  leave  the  stage.  BOHEMIA  and  LETTY 
hold  an  animated  conversation  in  dumb 
show.  CALLIE  listens  to  SAM  Sisco  with 
rapt  admiration. 

Five  thousand  years  ago,  before  the  earth  was  dry 
behind  the  ears,  these  monarchs  of  the  forest,  thet 
points  like  finger  posts  toward  the  starry  firmimeni 
above,  stood  like  mighty  sentinels  rearin'  their  lofty 
pinacles  .  .  . 

[PHILIP  enters  carrying  a  headlight  and 
places  it  so  that  it  illumines  the  natural 
stage  at  the  foot  of  the  hill. 

PHIL. 

(To  GROVER  ivho  has  fallen  asleep  on  the  bench) 
Here,  you!  Put  out  that  light! 

[GROVER  puts  out  gasoline  lamp  and  returns 
to  bench. 

BOHEMIA 
Oh,  what's  going  to  happen? 

LETTY 
That's  the  surprise. 

BOHEMIA 
Oh,  what  is  it,  Letty? 

35 


THE    LURE    OP    THE    TRAFFIC 

LETTY 

Wait  and  see.     It's  a  little  surprise  that  Muset  and 
I  got  up  for  you. 

BOHEMIA 

Oh,   you   dear,   sweet  girls!      You're   always   doing 
something  for  me. 

[Enter  MUSET  with  a  violin.  Taking  her  place 
in  the  center,  near  to  and  facing  the 
stage  she  begins  to  play.  OTHURS,  TOM, 
DICK  and  HARRY  emerge  from  the  tent 
and  take  places  in  front  of  the  stage. 
They  keep  on  their  hats  and  light  cigars 
using  many  matches.  Enter  on  the  stage 
a  young  Shepherd  with  a  crook.  He  sits 
down  dejectedly.  The  parts  of  the  Shep- 
herd and  Shepherdess  in  the  following 
scene  are  taken  by  DBA  MM  AH  and  ARTIE 
respectively.  MUSET  plays  a  violin 
accompaniment  during  the  action. 

SHEPHERD 

Ah,  woe  is  me  that  I  should  find 
Fair  Phyllis  is  no  longer  kind. 
Of  sorrow  I  have  drunk  my  fill; 
She  loves  me  not — I  love  her  still. 
Ah,  woe  is  me! 
36 


THE    LURE    OF    THE    TRAFFIC 

[A  Shepherdess  enters  unseen  by  the  Shep- 
herd and  stealing  up  behind  him  listens 
smilingly  to  his  lament. 

SHEPHERD 

Oh,  Phyllis,  sweet,  did  you  but  know 
What  anguish  'tis  to  love  you  so, 
You'd  pity  find  within  your  heart 
For  one  who  would  this  life  depart! 
Ah,  woe  is  me! 

If  I  were  made  of  other  clay 
Than  this  which  at  your  feet  I  lay 
Could  you  love  me  as  I  love  you? 

SHEPHERDESS 
(Stepping   forward} 
You  silly  boy,  of  course  I  do. 

SHEPHERD 

Am  I  awake  or  do  I   dream? 
My  eyes  are  dazzled  by  the  gleam 
Of  hope!    O  Phyllis,  dear,  my  own! 

SHEPHERDESS 
I'm  glad  that  you  have  ceased  to  moan. 

Remember,  Strephon,  maidens  oft 
Are  harsh  to  swains  who  prove  too  soft. 
37 


ACT   II. 

THE    PICNIC    IN    THE    LITTLE    GllOVE. 

'This  is  no  place  for  you,  little  girl.' 


THE    LURE    OF    THE    TRAFFIC 

You've  learned  your  lesson.   Come,  be  gay 
And  let  us  sing  a  roundelay. 

SONG 
( DRAM M AH  and  ARTIE.) 

[As  the  song  ends  the  hillside  is  illuminated 
with  red  and  green  fire. 

[During  the  little  play  TOM,  DICK  and  HARRY 
fall  asleep  and  snore.  OTHURS  fixes  a 
sinister  gaze  upon  BOHEMIA,  who  is 
engrossed  by  what  is  going  on  on  the 
stage.  When  the  play  is  ended  OTHURS 
takes  BOHEMIA  to  one  side.  SAM  Sisco, 
CALLIE,  PHILIP  and  LETTY  begin  to 
gather  up  the  dishes.  TOM,  DICK  and 
HARRY  remain  asleep,  snoring  loudly. 
MUSET,  ARTIE  and  DRAMMAH  come  in  and 
help  the  others  with  the  dishes. 

OTHURS 

(To  Bohemia)  This  is  no  place  for  you,  little  girl. 
Wait  until  you  go  down  to  the  city.  There  your 
beauty  and  your  talent  will  conquer  all  as  they  have 
conquered  me.  There,  among  the  bright  lights  of  the 
cafes — brighter  than  yonder  stars — there,  amid  the 
delirious  whirl  of  revelry  you  will  be  the  queen  of 
every  heart  as  you  are  queen  of  mine. 

39 


THE    LURE     OF    THE    TRAFFIC 

[BOHEMIA  breathes  hard  under  the  devilish 
hypnotism  of  his  refined  yet  thrilling 
speech.  PHILIP  watches  them  narrowly 
and  suspiciously.  MUSET  takes  LETTY  to 
one  side. 

MUSET 
What  did  they  think  of  it,  Letty? 

LETTY 

Oh,  Mr.  and  Mrs.  Sisco  and  Philip  said  the  picnic 
was  the  best  ever.    The  same  old  bull. 

MUSET 
Didn't  Bohemia  say  anything? 

LETTY 

Not  a  word.     I'm  never  going  to  do  anything  for 
her  again. 

MUSET 
No  more  shall  I. 

CALLIE 
Come  along  folks,  it's  time  ter  go  home. 

[TOM,  DICK  and  HARRY  wake  up  and  stretch 
themselves.  They  join  OTHURS,  BOHEMIA 
having  gone  to  help  CALLIE  with  the 
basket. 

HARRY 
Rotten  show,  rotten  place,  rotten  crowd! 

TOM 

Isn't  it  the  limit!    Why  didn't  they  have  an  illumi- 
nation? 

40 


THE    LURE    OF    THE    TRAFFIC 

DICK 

Yes.  You  can  see  a  better  show  at  the  Orpheum 
any  day. 

OTHUBS 

Shshsh!  I  have  a  purpose  in  coming  here.  We  must 
capture  the  works.  (To  the  others)  It  will  give  me 
great  pleasure  if  you  will  all  return  to  the  station  in 
m'  private  car.  This  young  man  (indicating  Philip) 
can  drive  the  wagon  home. 

BOHEMIA 

Oh,  lovely,  lovely,  lovely!  Come  along  girls!  Come 
along  everybody! 

[BOHEMIA  takes  OTHURS'  arm  and  they  go  out 
in  close  communion.  TOM,  DICK  and 
HARRY  escort  MUSET,  ARTIE  and  DRAMMAH 
off  respectively.  SAM  Sisco,  CALLIE  and 
LETTY  follow,  carrying  baskets.  The 
servants  who  have  been  busy  striking  the 
tent  also  go  off  carrying  luggage.  PHILIP 
is  left  alone  except  for  GROVER,  who  is 
asleep  on  the  bench. 

PHIL. 

(Shaking  his  fist  in  the  direction  taken  by  OTHURS) 
Have  a  care,  you!  When  she  needs  protection,  she 
can  count  on  me! 

CURTAIN 


41 


SCENE  1. 

The  sitting  room  of  the  Sisco  lodgings  on  Pine  Street 
in  San  Francisco.  The  furnishings  are  of  the 
simplest  sort.  A  table  near  the  center  and  sev- 
eral chairs.  A  number  of  academic  drawings  and 
paintings  of  the  nude  adorn  the  walls,  and  the 
motto,  "BOHEMIA'S  HOME  IS  HERE,"  is  again 
prominently  displayed.  Through  a  window  at  the 
back  the  chimney  pots  of  the  city  may  be  seen. 
Doors  at  left  and  right. 

Enter  BOHEMIA 

She  is  dressed  atrociously  in  the  manner  of  an  art 
student  and  carries  a  paint  box.  She  is  peevish 
and  throws  paint  box  on  chair,  then  removing  hat 
and  coat  throws  them  carelessly  to  one  side  and 
sits  down  sulkily  in  chair  which  stands  by  the 
table. 

BOHEMIA 

I  simply  can't  endure  this  life!     The  girls  at  the 
Art  School  are  going  to  have  a  jinks  tonight  and  I've 

43 


THE    LURE    OF    THE    TRAFFIC 

got  to  stay  at  home  and  wash  the  dishes.     I'm  not 
going  to  stand  it! 

Enter  CALLIE 

CALLIE 

Oh,  there  you  are.  Go  up  on  the  roof  this  minit 
an'  tek  in  th'  washin'. 

BOHEMIA 

I  won't  do  it!     I'm  tired  of  doing  housework.     All 
the  other  girls  have  good  times,  and  I  have  nothing 
but  work,  work,  work!     I  tell  you  I'm  tired  of  it! 
CALLIE 

(Irritably)  Don't  you  give  me  none  o'  that  sort  c' 
talk.  You  oughter  appreciate  what  Samuel  and  me 
is  a-doin'  fer  yer.  There  he  is  a  slavin'  away  in  th' 
chicken  stall  downstairs  in  the  market,  tryin'  ter  make 
enough  ter  give  ye  an'  edgication  and  pay  th'  interest 
on  the  mortgage  he  tuk  out  so's  you  could  come  down 
here  and  larn  how  ter  paint  them  thar  scand'lous 
pi'chers.  I'll  go  down  this  minit  an'  tell  him  t'  tek 
yer  back  ter  the!  farm,  that's  what  I'll  do. 

[CALLIE  flounces  out  of  room.  BOHEMIA 
bursts  into  tears,  then  jumps  up  and 
begins  to  pace  back  and  forth  across  the 
room. 

BOHEMIA 
(Petulantly)    I  don't  care!    Anyone  would  think  I 

44 


THE    LURE     OF    THE    TRAFFIC 


was  a  nigger  instead  of  a  white  girl.   I  won't  be  a 
slave! 

[There  is  a  knock  at  the  door.  BOHEMIA 
goes  to  door  and  opens  it. 

Enter  WYNOTT  OTHURS. 

[He  is  dressed  in  immaculate  afternoon 
costume.  BOHEMIA  stifles  a  glad  cry  of 
welcome. 

BOHEMIA 
Oh,  Mr.  Othurs,  I'm  so  glad  to  see  you. 

OTHURS 

(With  ingratiating  smile)  You  called  me  Wynott 
once — why  not  now? 

BOHEMIA 
Yes,  Wynott,  now  and  always.     Why  not? 

OTHURS 

You  have  been  crying,  Bohemia,  what  distresses 
you? 

BOHEMIA 

Oh,  Wynott,  I  suppose  I'm  foolish,  but  the  girls  in 
the  Art  School  are  having  a  jinks  tonight  and  mamma 
won't  let  me  go.    (She  weeps) 
OTHURS 

Oh,  is  that  all,  Bohemia?  Leave  your  mother 
to  me.  (Aside)  Ah-ha,  the  interest  on  the  mortgage's 
overdue!  (To  BOHEMIA)  I  think  she'll  do  what  I 
wish.  But  instead  of  going  to  the  jinks  suppose  you 

45 


THE    LURE    OF    THE    TRAFFIC 

come  with  me  and  have  a  bite  at  the  cafe  where 
Muset  is  singing.  I  got  her  a  job  as  an  entertainer, 
you  know.  You  will  be  properly  chaperoned  for  I 
shall  ask  my  friend  Mme.  Necessity,  a  dear  old  lady. 
She  is  devoted  to  young  girls.  Aren't  there  some 
other  girls  you  can  ask  to  come  along? 

BOHEMIA 

Why  yes,  Muset's  sisters  are  in  town.  I'll  ring 
them  up.  I'm  crazy  to  hear  her. 

OTHURS 

Good!  I'll  ask  Tom  Policy  and  the  other  chaps. 
(Aside,  shoiving  teeth}  Ah-ha,  m'  little  duckling, 
Fate  plays  into  m'  hands! 

{During  this  conversation  the  head  of  PHILIP 
GOODFELLOW  is  raised  cautiously  above 
the  window  ledge.  He  hears  all,  then 
drops  noiselessly  from  sight. 

BOHEMIA 

Mother  is  downstairs  in  the  market  with  father. 
Come  down  and  ask  her  if  I  can  go. 

[There  is  a  knock  at  door.  BOHEMIA  opens 
it  and  a  bearded  stranger  enters 

STRANGER 
Can  you  tell  me  where  I  will  find  the  Art  School? 

BOHEMIA 

Why  yes.  We  are  just  going  out.  It  is  right  on 
this  floor.  I  will  show  you. 

[BOHEMIA  goes  to  chair  at  back  and  picks 
up  hat. 

46 


THE    LURE    OF    THE    TRAFFIC 

STRANGER 

(Aside.  Slightly  removing  false  beard  and  reveal- 
ing face  of  PHILIP  GOODFELLOW)  I'll  foil  him  yet! 
Ha-ha! 

[BOHEMIA  holds  the  door  for  the  stranger  to 
pass  out.  OTHUKS  left  alone  snatches  the 
framed  motto  ''BOHEMIA'S  HOME  IS 
HERE"  from  the  wall  and,  holding  it 
behind  him,  goes  out  quickly. 


SCENE  2. 

A  "street  at  night. 
Enter  OTIIURS. 

[He   wears   a   black   Inverness    cape   and    a 
stovepipe  hat. 

OTHURS 

(Looking  at  watch  on  wrist)  It  lacks  but  a  minute 
of  the  appointed  time.  (Looking  off,  first  one  iv ay  and 
then  the  other)  Ah,  here  is  Loreley  now. 

Enter  LORELEY  MONTRIO. 

\_She  wears  a  long  sealskin  coat  and  a  large 
black  hat.   Her  face  is  pale  but  there  are 

47 


THE    LURE    OF    THE    TRAFFIC 

spots  of  rouge  on  her  cheeks  and  her  lip? 
are  painted  a  bright  carmine.  Her  eyes 
are  heavily  penciled. 

LORELEY 

What's  doin',  Wynott?  The  madame  says  you're  on 
the  trail  of  something.  She  said  you'd  give  me  the 
dope.  What  is  it?  Have  yer  got  a  line  on  a  kid  for 
us?  (With  a  sudden  show  of  affection}  Oh,  Wynott, 
why  don't  you  come  to  see  me  any  more.  I'm  making 
good  money  an'  everything  I've  got  is  yours. 

OTHURS 

(Throwing  off  the  hand  that  LORELEY  has  put  on 
his  arm)  Oh,  chuck  that,  Lorey.  I've  got  another 
game  now.  You  do  what  I  tell  you,  understand?  Go 
back  to  the  house  and  tell  the  old  girl  thai  I'll  expect 
her  at  Skate's  at  9  o'clock.  Tell  her  I'll  be  there 
with  a  flock  of  fan-tail  pigeons.  One  of  the  squabs  is 
a  loo-loo.  I've  got  her  going,  but  I  need  help,  see. 
The  rest  of  the  bunch  are  easy.  Just  like  picking 
cherries.  But  the  queen-bee'll  take  some  handling.  If 
the  madame  plays  her  cards  right  we'll  have  the  kid 
in  her  Movie  House  before  she  knows  what's  happened 
to  her.  I'll  fix  it  for  the  old  girl  to  be  alone  with 
the  chicken,  the  rest  is  up  to  her.  Th'  kid's  name's 
Bohemia,  and  she's  a  prize  package.  Do  you  get  me? 

LORELEY 
(Humbly)    Yes. 

OTHURS 
Good!  [They  go  out  in  opposite  directions. 

48 


THE    LURE    OF    THE    TRAFFIC 

SCENE  3. 

A  cafe.  At  one  side  a  platform  on  which  there  are  a 
number  of  musicians. 

BOHEMIA,  ARTIE,  LETTY,  DRAMMAH,  OTHURS,  TOM. 
DICK  and  HARRY  form  a  gay  party  at  three  of  the 
tables.  All  except  BOHEMIA  are  hilarious  and 
laugh  immoderately,  clinking  glasses  and  drink- 
ing. There  are  several  persons  at  other  tables 
and  among  them,  sitting  alone,  is  the  bearded 
stranger  who  appeared  in  the  sitting  room  on 
Pine  Street,  and  who  is  none  other  than  PHILIP 
GOODFELLOW.  As  the  curtain  rises,  MUSET,  on  the 
platform  is  just  finishing  a  popular  song  which 
is  greeted  by  applause  from  everyone  except 
BOHEMIA  and  the  stranger.  The  former  sits  with 
her  hands  in  her  lap  and  the  latter,  apparently 
indifferent  to  what  is  going  on  about  him,  keeps 
his  eye  on  the  merry  group  at  the  center  tables. 
MUSET  joins  the  group. 

OTHURS 

(Leaning  over  BOHEMIA  and  addressing  her)  Why 
so  pensive,  little  girl?  Come  now,  cheer  up.  Take  a 
sip  of  wine.  It  will  do  you  good. 

BOHEMIA 

I  thought  you  told  me  there  would  be  a  chaperone 
for  the  party. 

49 


THE    LURE    OF    THE    TRAFFIC 


OTHUES 

So  I  did,  and  so  there  will.     Mme.  Necessity  should 
be  here  any  minute. 

[As  OTHURS  speaks  MME.  NECESSITY  appears 
at  the  entrance.  She  wears  a  magnificent 
cloak  which  she  lets  fall  from  her 
shoulders  into  the  hands  of  a  boy  in  but- 
tons, revealing  a  gorgeous  evening 
costume.  Her  blonde  hair  has  the 
appearance  of  being  a  wig  and  is  pro- 
fusely studded  with  diamonds.  OTHUKS 
hastens  forward  to  meet  her  and  escorts 
her  to  the  table.  Just  as  MME.  NECESSITY 
appears  the  cafe  orchestra  strikes  up  "Oh 
You  Beautiful  Doll."  This  continues 
while  the  introductions  are  being  made. 
Finally  MME.  NECESSITY  sits  down  beside 
BOHEMIA  and  the  music  stops. 

MME.  N. 

Gracious  goodness,  Wynott,  I  thought  I  should  never 
get  here.  We  had  two  punctures  on  the  way  down. 
(Removes  gloves  displaying  many  diamond  rings) 
*Do  give  me  something  to  drink,  I'm  perishing  of 
thirst.  (OTHURS  fills  her  glass)  That's  a  good  boy. 
Thank  you.  Here's  my  best  to  you  all.  (Drinks) 
So  this  is  Bohemia?  Well,  well,  well,  well,  well,  well! 
Wynott  has  told  me  lots  about  you.  But  he  didn't 
tell  me  the  most  important  thing  of  all.  No  indeed 

50 


THE    LURE     OF    THE    TRAFFIC 

lie  didn't.    He  didn't  tell  me  that  you  were  beautiful. 

OTHURS 
Oh,  I  protest. 

MME.  N. 

No,  Wynott,  no.  You  did  not  say  that  Bohemia  was 
beautiful.  You  said  she  was  very  pretty,  but  you 
did  not  say  she  was  beautiful.  You  positively  did  not 
say  it.  You  left  me  entirely  unprepared.  I  shall 
never  forgive  you  Wynott,  never!  Why  she  is  per- 
fectly ravishing.  (Observing  BOHEMIA'S  embar- 
rassment} Qh,  don't  mind  me,  my  child.  I'm  an  old 
woman  and  I  can  say  what  I  think.  You  are 
beautiful  and  you  might  as  well  make  the  most  of  it. 
That's  what  every  beautiful  woman  should  do.  Look 
at  me.  I  was  beautiful  once.  Was  I  not,  Wynott? 

OTHURS 
You  are  beautiful  still,  madame. 

[Cries  of  "Yes,  yes"  from  TOM,  DICK  and 
HARRY.  All  the  girls  except  BOHEMIA 
gaze  transfixed  at  MME.  NECESSITY. 

MME.  N. 

You  haven't  changed  a  bit,  Wynott.  Once  a  flat- 
terer, always  a  flatterer.  (As  he  fills  her  glass) 
Thank  you.  And  now  permit  me  to  propose  a  toast: 
To  beautiful  Bohemia.  May  her  name  and  her  fame 
fly  on  the  wings  of  her  accomplishments  to  the  ends 
of  the  earth.  May  she  be  loved  and  admired  in  the 
capitals  of  the  world  as  she  is  adored  and  respected 
in  her  native  state— California. 

51 


THE    LURE    OF    THE    TRAFFIC 

[All  drink  with  cries  of  "Hear,  hear!" 
"Here's  to  BOHEMIA." 

MUSET 

(Rising  and  holding  her  glass  aloft)  Here's  to 
fame  and  publicity. 

LETTY 

(Pulling  her  down)     Muset,   I'm   ashamed  of  you. 
[By    this    time    everyone    has    left    the    cafe 
except  the  mysterious  stranger,  who,  dur- 
ing the  foregoing,  clutches   the   table  with 
marked  signs  of  perturbation. 

OTHUBS 

(Calling  waiter)  I'd  better  order  a  couple  of  taxis 
to  take  the  girls  home. 

MME.  N. 

One  will  do  for  the  other  girls.  I'll  take  Bohemia 
home  in  my  car. 

OTHURS 

All  right.  (To  TOM,  DICK  and  HARRY)  You  fellows 
come  with  me  to  the  club  and  have  a  good-night 
drink.  (To  waiter)  Order*  a  taxi  and  call  Mme. 
Necessity's  car. 

[The  mysterious  stranger  gets  up  and  goes 
out  quickly  after  the  waiter.  The  party 
rises  and  puts  on  coats  and  wraps.  All 
go  out  except  MME.  N.,  who  also  detains 
BOHEMIA  by  laying  her  hand  upon  her 
arm.  OTHURS  glances  back  at  BOHEMIA 

52 


THE    LURE    OP    THE    TRAFFIC 

and   MME.   N.  and  nods  with  a  satisfied 
smile. 

MME.  N. 

My  dear,  I  am  going  to  talk  very  frankly  to  you 
because  you  remind  me  of  my  little  girl  who  died, 
and  I  feel  I  must  just  mother  you. 

BOHEMIA 
(Tenderly)    What  was  your  little  girl's  name? 

MME.   N. 

Her  name  was  Invention.  Poor  little  Ventie. 
(Sniffling)  I  have  been  a  changed  woman  since  she 
passed  into  the  beyond.  Now,  my  child,  let  me  tell  you 
something.  Wynott  Othurs  is  madly  in  love  with  you. 
I  haven't  lived  all  these  years  for  nothing.  I  know  a 
man  in  love  when  I  see  one.  But  I  want  you  to  take 
your  time  about  marrying  him,  or  any  man;  be  sure 
you  love  him,  and  don't  let  marriage  come  too  soon 
between  you  and  your  art.  There's  time  enough  for 
marriage,  my  dear.  Believe  me! 

[A  chauffeur  in  livery  appears  and  whispers 
to  a  waiter  who  approaches  MME. 
NECESSITY. 

WAITER 
Madame,  the  car  waits. 

MME.  N. 

Come  Bohemia  we  must  be  going.  I  shall  take  you 
to  your  home,  Bohemia — to  your  home. 

53 


THE    LURE    OB"    THE    TRAFFIC 

[They  pass  out.  The  chauffeur  takes  off  his 
cap  and  removes  his  mustache.  It  is 
PHILIP  GOODFELLOW. 

PHIL. 

I  have  driven  her  home  before  now  and  I'll  see  that 
she  gets  home  tonight! 

[Replaces  cap  and  mustache  and  goes  out. 


SCENE  4. 

A  dark  street  before  a  house  over  the  door  of  which 
there  is  a  rosy  light  and  an  inscription,  "The 
Wenban." 

Enter  WYNOTT  OTHURS  stealthily  creeping  close  to 
buildings.  He  carries  the  framed  motto. 

OTHURS 

Ha!  Once  within  yon  rosy  portal  and  Bohemia's 
ruin  is  assured!  Now  to  place  this  motto  where  it 
belongs.  Ha!  Bohemia's  home  is  HERE. 

[He  starts1  to  enter  the  house. 

The  sound  of  an  approaching  motor  vehicle  is  heard. 
It  stops.  Enter  MME.  NECESSITY.  She  walks 
rapidly  as  if  greatly  agitated. 

14 


THE    LURE    OF    THE    TRAFFIC 

OTHURS 
(Leaping  forward  and  hissing)    Where  is  she? 

MME.  N.  • 
(Angrily)     Home.     Damn  her! 

OTHURS 
How's  that?    Home? 

[Enter  LORELEY  MONTRIO   unsteadily,   unseen 
by  the  others. 

MME.  N. 

Yes.  A  guy  took  the  place  of  my  chauffeur  and 
drove  us  to  Pine  Street  before  I  knew  where  we  were 
going.  He  left  me  there  and  I  had  to  come  home  in  a 
taxi. 

OTHURS 

Goodfellow  again!    Damn!! 
LORELEY 

(Laughing  a  drunken,  metallic  laugh)  Gave  ye  th* 
slip,  eh?  More  trouble  than  you  had  with  me!  But  1 
don't  hold  it  against  yer.  Not  I.  I'm  havin'  a  good 
time!  Plenty  of  suckers  and  plenty  of  booze!  Whee! 
(She  giggles  mirthlessly). 

OTHURS 

(Seizing  LORELEY  by  the  wrist)  Not  so  much  noise 
unless  you  want  your  gullet  squeezed!  (Making 
threatening  gesture  as  if  to  throttle  her)  Listen,  girl! 
You  loved  muh  once,  God  help  you!  Now  you  must 
help  us.  Tomorrow  you  shall  take  a  position  as  model 

55 


THE    LURE     OF    THE    TRAFFIC 

at  the  Art  School.  I'll  fix  it.  Become  the  friend  of 
the  girl  and  deliver  her  to  us.  Here's  a  hundred  to 
show  that  I  mean  business.  There's  a  thousand  in  it 
for  you  when  you  succeed.  (Threateningly)  And  if 
you  don't  succeed — well  there'll  be  a  body  found  float- 
ing in  the  bay.  Understand? 

[LOBELEY  stands  unsteadily  for  a  moment 
looking  stupidly  at  the  money  in  her 
hand.  Then  throws  herself  upon  OTHURS. 

LOBELEY 

Wynott,  Wynott,  I  love  you  still!     My  God!     I'd  do 
anything  for  you! 

OTHURS 

(With  deep  meaning)    I  know  that  already,  girlie! 
[A  derisive  laugh  is  heard  off  stage. 

OTHURS 
(In  alarm)    What  was  that?    An  eavesdropper. 

[He  hurries  off. 
MME.  N. 

Come  on  in,  dear,  I  want  to  see  how  much  you  owe 
the  house. 


56 


til 


SCENE  1. 

The  Art  School.  The  room  is  filled  with  chairs  and 
easels  with  drawing  boards.  There  are  many 
drawings  and  paintings  on  the  walls. 

The  students,  among  whom  are  BOHEMIA  and  PHILIP 
GOODFELLOW,  are  idling.  LOBELEY  MONTBIO,  wear- 
ing a  scarlet  cloak,  is  seated  on  the  edge  of  the 
model  throne  eating  hei*  lunch  from  a  paper  bag. 

PHIL. 
Cheese  it!     Here  comes  the  professor! 

[The  students  scurry  to  their  places  and 
begin  to  work.  LOBELEY  gets  up  hurriedly 
and  letting  the  cloak  fall  is  revealed  in  a 
state  of  nudity.  She  assumes  a  pose. 

Enter  MONSIEUB  JAY. 

[He  goes  about  from  easel  to  easel  criticising 
in  pantomime  the  work  of  the  students. 
After  a  little,  LOBELEY  moves  her  position 
slightly. 

57 


ACT  IV,  Scene  1. 

AT  THE  ART  SCHOOL. 

"Thank    you,    Miss    Montrio,    it   is    an    inspiration   to 
work  with  you." 


THE    LURE    OF    THE    TRAFFIC 

BOHEMIA 

Excuse  me,  Miss  Montrio,  but  we  can't  go  on  unle'ss 
you  keep  the  pose. 

[MONSIEUR  JAY.  much  agitated,  goes  to 
LORELEY  and  tries  to  readjust  her  In 
position.  He  has  a  great  deal  of  ditfi 
culty. 

PHIL. 

(Leaving  his  place  and  approaching  the  throne)  I 
beg  your  pardon,  but  I  think  I  can  get  the  pose. 

MONS.  JAY  shrugs  his  shoulders  and  steps 
aside.  PHILIP  tries  to  adjust  LORELEY  in 
the  pose,  handling  her  ivith  the  greatest 
freedom  in  doing  so.  LORELEY  smiles 
graciously  upon  him.  BOHEMIA  picks  up 
two  or  three  pieces  of  charcoal,  breaks 
them  angrily  and  throws  them  on  the 
floor. 

PHIL. 

(To  LORELEY)  Perhaps  you  are  too  tired  to  pose 
any  longer? 

LORELEY 
(With  tenderness)     Yes,  I'm  awfully  tired. 

PHIL. 

(Turning  round)  The  model  is  tired.  We  should 
not  ask  her  to  pose  any  longer.  (To  LORELEY)  Thank 
you,  Miss  Montrio,  it  is  an  inspiration  to  work  with 
you. 

591 


THE    LURE    OF    THE    TRAFFIC 

[PHILIP  and  LORELEY  talk  together  for  a 
moment.  The  students  pick  up  their 
belongings  and  prepare  to  leave.  BOHEMIA 
does  likewise,  showing  irritation.  All 
leave  except  BOHEMIA  and  LORELEY. 

LORELEY 

(Descending  from  the  throne  and  picking  up  her 
clothes)  You  mustn't  be  provoked  with  me  for  get- 
ting tired.  Some  people  can  pose  without  getting 
tired  at  all,  but  I  can't.  Come,  let's  be  friends.  I  like 
you  and  I'm  so  happy  here.  Don't  tell  anybody,  but 
that  young  fellow,  Philip  Goodfellow,  has  a  case  on 
me.  He  asked  me  just  now  to  meet  him  tonight  at 
half-past  ten  at  Post  and  Grant  Avenue. 

[BOHEMIA  is  stung  to  the  quick,  but  she  dis- 
sembles her  agony. 

BOHEMIA 

(Freezingly)  Oh,  I  should  say  you  were  most 
fortunate.  I  wish  you  good  day.  (Goes  out). 

[LORELEY  flings  her  garments  in  the  air  and 
dances  about  waving  her  pantalons 
above  her  head. 

LORELEY 

(Ecstatically)  A  thousand  plunks!  A  thousand 
plunks! 

60 


THE    LURE     OF    THE    TRAFFIC 


SCENE  2. 

The  corner  of  Post  Street  and  Grant  Avenue  at  night. 
Enter  BOHEMIA,  heavily  veiled. 

She  stands  motionless,  waiting.  Enter  LORELEY, 
carrying  music  roll.  BOHEMIA  springs  forward 
and  seizes  LORELEY  oy  the  arm. 

BOHEMIA 

You  shall  not  have  him;  he  is  mine,  I  tell  you, 
mine! 

LORELEY 

Oh,  I'm  so  glad  you're  here.  I  thought  you'd  come. 
That's  why  I  told  you  what  I  did  this  afternoon. 
Calm  yourself  and  listen.  I  am  not  in  love  with 
Philip  Goodfellow.  My  heart  belongs  to  another. 
When  he  comes  I  intend  to  tell  him  so.  I  shall 
reproach  him  for  being  untrue,  even  in  thought,  to 
the  pure  girl  who  loves  him. 

BOHEMIA 

Oh,  Miss  Montrio,  how  can  you  ever  forgive  me  for 
suspecting  you  of  a  base  motive;  you  who  have 
shown  by  your  noble  actions  that  you  are  so  good 
and  sweet!  (She  weeps). 

LORELET 

(Kissing  BOHEMIA)  There,  there,  my  dear,  don't 
cry.  Do  what  I  say  and  all  will  yet  be  well.  I  was 
to  meet  Philip  Goodfellow  in  a  room  in  that  building 

61 


THE    LURE     OF    THE    TRAFFIC 


there  over  Schonwasser's.     Come  there  with  me,  and 
you  shall  have  your  heart's  desire.    Come! 

BOHEMIA 
(Hesitating)    But   .    .   .   but. 

LORELEY 

Come!      Your  happiness   and   his   depend   upon    it. 
Come!  [They  go  out. 


SCENE  3. 

A  red  room.     Sumptuously  furnished  and  containing 
many  pictures.    A  table  and  two  chairs  at  center. 

Enter  BOHEMIA  and  LORELEY 

LORELEY 

Now,  dearie,  the  battle  is  half  won.  You  must 
trust  me  implicitly  and  do  what  1  tell  you.  Philip 
Goodfellow  will  be  here  in  a  few  minutes.  He  expects 
to  find  me  here,  but  he  will  recognize  your  cloches 
and  he  will  not  commit  himself  so  that  you  may  give 
him,  first  the  severe  rebuke  he  deserves  and,  after- 
wards, your  forgiveness. 

BOHEMIA 

Oh,  Miss  Montrio,  I'm  so  frightened.  What  do  you 
want  me  to  do? 

61 


THE    LURE    OP    THE    TRAFFIC 

LORELEY 

(With  finality)    Undress! 

[BOHEMIA  quails. 
BOHEMIA 
Oh,  no,  no,  no.     I  can't,  I  can't! 

LORELEY 

(Gently)  You  must.  Here — here's  a  nighty  1 
brought  in  this  music  roll.  Philip  Goodfellow  must 
not  recognize  you  until  he  has  given  evidence  of  his 
intention  in  coming  here. 

[LORELEY  begins  to  undress  BOHEMIA,  who 
yields  protestingly. 

LORELEY 

(Soothingly  during  the  process  of  disrobing)  Now, 
now — there,  there — there's  a  dear.  (When  the  dis- 
robing is  completed)  There!  Now  sit  down  here. 
Now  let  your  hair  fall  over  your  face  a  little.  That's 
right.  Now  you  should  have  something  to  read.  Let 
me  see.  (Looking  over  books  on  table)  Yes.  Here's 
"Great  Expectations."  (Hands  book  to  BOHEMIA,  who 
takes  it  and  begins  to  read)  Now,  dearie,  I'm  going 
to  leave  you,  but  I  shall  be  near  at  hand  when  you 
need  me.  All  you  have  to  do  is  to  call  and)  I  shall 
come  instantly. 

[LORELEY  goes  stealthily  to  where  a  picture  is 
leaning  against  the  wainscoting  of  the 
room.  She  picks  it  up  and  hangs  it  on 

63 


THE    LURE     OP    THE    TRAFFIC 

the  wall     Then  going  to  the  door, 
opens  it  very  slowly  and  goes  out. 


SLOW  CURTAIN 


SCENE  4. 

A  street  at  night. 

Enter  PHILIP  GOODFELLOW. 

He  is  suffering  extreme  fatigue  and  can  hardly  drag 
one  foot  after  the  other. 

PHIL. 

No  use!  No  use!  I  have  walked  the  streets  for 
hours  but  have  found  no  trace  of  poor  Heemie. 
Where  can  she  be?  How  and  why  did  she  disappear 
in  this  mysterious  way?  What  will  her  distracted 
parents  say  when  I  tell  them  that  the  quest  they  have 
sent  me  upon  has  been  in  vain? 

64 


THE    LURE    OF    THE    TRAFFIC 


Enter  OFFICER  TOOLE. 

PHIL. 

(Desperately)  A  last  chance!  A  last  chance!  (To 
officer)  Officer,  I'm  in  search  of  a  lost  girl.  Can  you 
give  me  any  advice  or  assistance? 

OFFICER  T. 

Sure  an'  I  can.  Hev  ye  'bin  down  to  the  Harbor 
station  yit? 

PHIL. 
No. 

OFFICER  T. 

Well,  bate  it  down  there.  Like  as  not  they  know 
somethin'  about  her.  Four  blocks  straight  ahid  and 
wan  to  yer  lift.  A  busted  lamp-post,  two  stips  down 
and  there  you  are.  The  dour's  locked  now,  but  they'll 
let  ye  in  if  y'  knock.  Say  Toole  sint  ye. 

PHIL. 
Oh  thank  you,  thank  you!  [Runs  off. 

OFFICER  T. 

That's  wan  on  him,  all  right.  Harbor  station! 
(Chuckles)  He'll  have  a  hard  time  findin'  that  from 

65 


THE    LURE    OF    THE    TRAFFIC 

where  I  sint  him.  The  Doorkeepers'  Union  is  a  lot  o' 
good  lads.  They  come  through  with  a  bit  right  along 
an'  the  least  I  kin  do  is  to  pass  'em  a  sucker  now 
and  thin.  (Singing)  "There's  a  purty  schpat  in  Ire- 
land— I  always  claim  it  my  land,"  etc. 


SCENE  5. 

The  retreat  of  the  Doorkeepers'  Union  under*  the 
docks.  The  vaulted  chamber  is  feebly  lighted  by 
a  candle  stuck  in  a  bottle  on  a  low  improvised 
table,  around  which  are  huddled  the  figures  of 
the  Doorkeepers  in  executive  session.  All  are 
eating  busily.  The  rays  of  the  candle  play  upon 
the  saturnine  but  not  unhandsome  features  of  the 
leader,  GENTLEMAN  FRANK.  All  but  he  wear  black 
gowns  and  hoods  with  holes  cut  for  the  eyes  and 
mouth.  On  the  breast  of  each  is  a  white  disc 
within  which  are  three  black  discs.  This  is  the 
sign  of  the  three  black-balls.  GENTLEMAN  FRANK'S 
gown  is  red  and  bears  on  the  breast  the  sign  of  a 
double  cross.  The  only  covering  on  his  face  is 
skin  and  a  pair  of  spectacles.  Through  a  square 
opening  at  the  back  of  the  chamber  the  rays  of 

66 


THE    LURE    OF    THE    TRAFFIC 

the  moon  may  be  seen  in  scintillating  reflection 
upon  the  dark  blue  waters  of  the  bay.  As  the 
curtain  rises,  a  peculiar,  long,  low  whistle  is 
heard  from  without.  It  is  given  three  times. 

GENT.  F. 

There's  the  secretary.  Let  him  in,  Billy,  and  we 
will  proceed1,  to  business. 

[One  of  the  Doorkeepers  goes  to  the  door, 
loosens  a  number  of  chains  and  bolts  and 
admits  a  person  garbed  like  the  others. 
He  takes  his  position  with  the  rest. 
GENTLEMAN  FRANK  raps  for  order. 

GENT.  F. 
What  business  is  there  before  the  meeting? 

BILLY 

(With  acerbity)  I'd  like  to  call  attention  to  the 
fact  that  the  food  they're  giving  us  is  not  fit  to  eat. 
It's  getting  worse  and  worse. 

[A  loud  knocking  is  heard  at  the  door.,  GEN- 
TLEMAN FRANK  blows  out  the  candle, 
leaving  the  room  in  complete  darkness. 

PHIL. 

(Off  stage}  Hello  there,  let  me  in!  (Knocks  again) 
Hello!  Hello,  I  say!  I  was  sent  here  by  Officer 
Toole. 

GENT.  F. 

(In  a,  whisper)  Let  him  in  Billy.  Boys,  keep  your 
weapons  handy. 

67 


THE    LURE    OF    THE    TRAFFIC 


[GENTLEMAN  FRANK  strikes  a  match  and 
lights  the  candle.  The  Doorkeepers 
gather  around  the  door  and  each  holds  a 
hatchet  in  readiness.  The  one  addressed 
as  "BILLY"  opens  the  door.  PHILIP 
enters.  He  is  seized  and  rushed  across 
the  chamber,  where  he  is  held  by  two  of 
the  Doorkeepers  while  a  third  goes 
through  his  pockets,  taking  his  watch 
and  other  valuables  and  placing  them  on 
the  table. 

GENT.  F. 
Well,  sir,  what  do  you  want? 

PHIL. 

(Defiantly}    I  want  Bohemia. 
GENT.  F. 

Ah,  you  have  indeed  come  to  the  right  place.     We 
know  all  about  Bohemia  here. 
PHIL. 
(Overjoyed)  Oh,  do  you?     Where  is  she? 

GENT.  F. 
She?     Bohemia  is  not  a  she. 

PHIL. 

(Hotly)    You're  a  damn  liar! 
GENT.  F. 

(In  a  voice  that  would  freeze  a  blast  furnace) 
Before  you  die,  you  will  be  asked  to  answer  a  few 
questions.  Who  are  your  sponsors? 

68 


THE    LURE    OP    THE    TRAFFIC 

PHIL. 
(Defiantly)    I  have  no  sponsors. 

GENT.  F. 

You  can  not  find  Bohemia  without  sponsors.  Here, 
Billy,  Matt,  act  as  sponsors  for  this  gentleman.  (Two 
of  the  Doorkeepers  step  forward)  How  long  have 
you  known  this  man? 

BILLY 
About  five  minutes. 

GENT.  F. 
(To  the  other  Doorkeeper)     And  you? 

MATTHEW 
About  four  minutes  and  a  half. 

GENT.  F. 
Is  he  married? 

BILLY 
I  don't  know. 

MATTHEW 
Nor  I. 

GENT.  F. 

Is  he  connected  professionally  with  literature,  art, 
music  or  the  drama,  or  has  he  love  or  appreciation 
of  these  objects? 

BILLY 

We    believe    that    his    profession    is    insurance     or 
automobiles  but  he  possesses  exceptional  talent  as  an 
artist,  musician  and  writer.     In  fact,  he  can  do  any- 
'thing,  and  he  is  always  willing  to  help. 

69 


THE    LURE    OP    THE    TRAFFIC 

GENT.  F. 

How  long  did  you  say  you  had  been  acquainted 
with  him. 

BILLY 
About  six  minutes — now. 

GENT.  F. 
Um-m-m.     Have  you  lent  him  any  money? 

BILLY 

No,  but  as  his  sponsor  and  in  consideration  of  the 
business  he  may  bring!  in  I  am  willing  to  put  up  his 
initiation  fee  and  pay  his  dues. 
GENT.  F. 

Would  you  invite  him  to -your  house  to  meet  your 
family? 

BILLY 
Most  assuredly. 

GENT.  F. 
Have  you  ever  done  so? 

BILLY 
No. 

GENT.  F. 

Um-m.  Let  the  accused  speak  for  himself.  (PHILIP 
is  rudely  dragged  forward.}  What  is  your  name? 

PHIL. 
Philip  Goodfellow. 

•GENT.  F. 

Ah,  I  thought  so.  »We  have  positive  evidence  in 
our  possession  that  you  have  been  convicted  at 
various  times  of  murder,  rape,  burglary,  mayhem, 

70 


THE    LURE    OF    THE    TRAFFIC 

simony  and  barratry;  also  that  you  are  an  escape 
from  San  Quentin  where  you  were  confined  under 
sentence  of  death  for  murdering  a  Chinaman  with  a 
claw  hammer  in  Siskiyou  County  in  1889;  also  that 
in  escaping  you  killed  two  of  the  guards;  also  that 
you  belong  to  a  sect  which  practices  ritual  murder; 
also  .  .  . 

PHIL. 
(Interrupting  with  spirit)    It  is  false! 

GENT.  F. 
Gag  him! 

[One  of  the  Doorkeepers  places  a  gag  over 
PHILIP'S  mouth. 

GENT.  F. 

Do  not  deny  it.  Evasion  is  useless.  What  have  you 
to  say  for  yourself?  (Pause)  He  does  not  speak.  It 
remains  for  us  only  to  pass  judgment  upon  him. 
Billy,  as  his  sponsor  can  you  tell  me  whether  or  not 
this  monster  plays  the  piano? 
BILLY 

Yes,   he  commits   that   crime   beautifully   and   con- 
stantly. 

THE  DOORKEEPERS 
(Together)    Gr-r-r-r-r! 

GENT.  F. 
Enough!    Administer  the  pills! 

[PHILIP  is  thrown  upon  the  low  table  and 
bound  hand  and  foot.  Two  of  the  Door- 
keepers fetch  three  large  black  pills.  The 

71 


THE    LURE    OP    THE    TRAFFIC 

Doorkeepers  close  around  the  table  a/id 
there  are  evidences  of  a  struggle. 

BILLY 
I  can't  get  his  jaws  open. 

GENT.  F. 
Here  fetch  me  a  cold  chisel  and  hammer. 

[One  of  the  Doorkeepers  hands  the  tools  to 
GENTLEMAN  FRANK,  who  takes  them  and 
drives  the  chisel  between  PHILIP'S  jaws 
with  heavy  blows  of  the  hammer. 

GENT.  F. 

There!      Now  in  with  it!    Good! 
THE  DOORKEEPERS 
( Together )    Gr-r-r-r-r ! 

GENT.  F. 
Now  the  other!    Good! 

THE  DOORKEEPERS 
(Together)    Gr-r-r-r-r! 

GENT.  F. 
Now  the  third  and  last.     Good!  «. 

THE  DOORKEEPERS 
( Together )    Gr-r-r-r-r ! 

GENT.  F. 

Now  douse  the  glim  and  give  him  the  third  degree. 
(The  light  is  put  out  and  the  voice  of  GENTLEMAN 
FRANK  is  heard  to  say:)  "Do  you  kick  like  a  steer 
nt  everything?" 

[There  is  the  sound  of  a  blow  and  PHILIP 
groans. 

72 


THE    LURE    OF    THE    TRAFFIC 


"Do  you  knock  your  neighbors?" 

[A  succession  of  blows  and  groans. 
"Do  you  raise  hell  when  you're  drunk?" 

[More  blows  and  groans. 
"Do  you  cheat  at  cards?" 

[Still  more  blows  and  groans.    PHILIP  makes 
a  sound  indicating  assent. 

GENT.  F. 

That  fixed   him.     Billy,   give   us   a   light.       (BILLY 
lights  candle)    Now  into  the  bay  with  him  boys,  the 
old  stern-wheeler,  "General  Riley  Hardin"  is  about  to 
pass.    When  she  strikes  him  it  will  be  "Good  night!" 
[Several    Doorkeepers    pick    up    PHILIP    and 
carry  him   to  the  back  of  the  chamber. 
They  chant  a  stave  of  "Yo-ho!  throw  a 
man  down,"  and  throw  PHILIP  through 
the    square    opening    into    the    moonlit 
waters   beyond.     The  sound  of  the  body 
striking  the  water  is  heard  and  a  jet  of 
spray  is  flung  high  in  the  air.     At  the 
same  moment  an  enormous   stern-wheel 
steamer  is  seen  to  lumber  by,  coughing 
and    rattling    horribly.      The    Doorkeep- 
ers again  gather  around  the  table    and 
begin  to  eat. 

GENT.  F. 

And  now  gentlemen,  what  was  the  business  before 
the  meeting  when  we  were  rudely  interrupted? 

73 


THE    LURE    OF    THE    TRAFFIC 

BILLY 

I  had  laid  before  the  meeting  a  complaint  regarding 
the  quality  of  food  that  is  being  served  to  us. 

GENT.  F. 

That  is  in  the  hands  of  the  chairman  of  the  dining 
room  committee  of  the  parent  body.  (Significantly} 
I  suppose  he  will  have  to  be — seen. 

BILLY 
How  much  will  it  take  to  fix  him? 

GENT.  F. 

I  don't  know.  You  might  try  him  with  five.  But, 
hold  on!  There's  a  friend  of  his  up  for  admission  to 
membership.  Ah-ha,  we  have  him  on  the  hip! 

THE  DOORKEEPERS 
(Together)    Gr-r-r-r-r-r!     Gr-r-r-r-r-r!      Gr-r-r-r-r-r! 


SCENE  6. 

The  Red  Room.     BOHEMIA  is  seated  reading  "Great 
Expectations."     There  is  a  knock  on  the  door. 

BOHEMIA 

(To  herself,  with  timorous  fervor)     Philip!     (The 
knock  is  repeated.)    (Timidly)    Come. 

Enter  WYNOTT  OTHURS 
74 


THE    LURE    OF    THE    TRAFFIC 

He  is  arrayed  in  full  evening  dress,  white  waistcoat 
and  white  gloves.  He  gazes  with  a  leer  of  satin- 
faction  at  BOHEMIA,  who  does  not  look  up  but  sits 
trembling  ivith  her  hair  falling  over  her  face  and 
concealing  it.  WYNOTT,  still  standing  near  the 
door,  begins  to  take  off  his  gloves,  one  finger  at  a 
time.  He  continues  to  leer  horribly  and  slowly 
to  nod  his  head  with  satisfaction.  Silence.  Very 
slowly,  BOHEMIA  raises  her  eyes.  Then  she  sees 
OTHURS  and  utters  a  piercing  scream. 

BOHEMIA 
(Frantically)    Loreley!     Loreley!    Come  to  me! 

[OTHUKS  removes  one  glove,  blows  into  it 
gently  and  begins  to  remove  the  other. 
He  continues  to  leer.  BOHEMIA  runs  to 
the  door  at  the  opposite  side  of  the  room 
through  which,  in  the  preceding  scene 
LORELEY  went  out,  and  tries  frantically  to 
open  it.  The  door,  however,  does  not 
yield. 

BOHEMIA 
(Desperately)    Locked! 

[OTHURS  continues  to  remove  glove  and  to 
leer. 

BOHEMIA 

(Precipitately)  What  have  you  come  here  for?  .  .  . 
You  are  here  for  no  good!  ...  I  see  it  in  your 
face!  ...  I  don't  trust  you!  ...  I  can  trust  no 

75 


ACT  IV,  Scene  6. 

IN   TIIj:   RED   ROOM. 

"I  have  done  my  thinking;  now  I'm  going  to  act." 


THE    LURE    OF    THE    TRAFFIC 


man  with  a  face  like  that!  Ah,  God!  Why  did  I  not 
know  this  before!  .  .  .  You  must  let  me  go!  I 
must  go;  do  you  hear!  .  .  . 

[BOHEMIA  tries  to  pass  OTHURS  and  reach 
door  behind  him.  He  flings  her  back 
then,  turning  around  locks  the  door  and 
puts  the  key  in  his  pocket. 

Oh,  sir!  .  .  .  Wynott!  .  .  .  Haven't  you  any  pity? 
Let  me  go!  Wynott,  let  me  go!  (Throws  herself  at 
his  feet)  Think  of  what  you  are  doing,  Wynott,  or 
what  you  are  going  to  do.  You  had  a  mother,  Wynott. 
Think  what  she  would  say  if  she  could  see  you  now! 
Think,  Wynott!  I  beg  of  you!  I  implore  you.  (Be- 
coming exhausted  and  slowly  sinking  toward  the 
floor)  Think!  .  .  .  Wynott!  .  .  .  Wynott! 

[BOHEMIA  sinks  into  a  limp  sobbing  mass  at 
feet  of  OTHURS. 

OTHURS 

(Stooping  over  her)  I  have  done  my  thinking. 
Now  I  am  going  to  act! 

[BOHEMIA  gradually  assumes  a  sitting 
posture  leaning  on  one  hand,  the  other  is 
at  her  cheek  and  there  is  a  frightened 
look  in  her  eyes. 

I'm  too  old  a  hand  at  this  game  to  be  bluffed  out 
by  any  of  that  mother  stuff.  I  have  wasted  enough 
time  on  you.  Before  this  night  is  over  you  will  be 

77 


THE    LURE    OP    THE    TRAFFIC 

in  a  Movie  House.  For  months  that  has  been  my 
clearest  wish.  Why  was  it,  do  you  suppose,  that  I 
went  to  your  picnic  in  the  little  grove?  Because  1 
wished  to  get  you  in  my  clutches  so  that  I  could  put 
you  in  a  Movie  House!  What  was  it  that  prompted 
me  to  advance  money  to  your  father?  The  Movie 
House!  Why  did  I  have  you  meet  Mme.  Necessity? 
Ha!  because  the  Movie  House  is  hers!  Bohemia  in 
a  Movie  House!  That  has  been  m'  dream  ever  since  I 
first  saw  you  in  the  garden  at  the  old  farm. 

•  [BOHEMIA  again  sinks  to  the  floor  convulsed 
with  sobs.  OTHUBS  looks  at  her  with  a 
half-mocking,  half -satisfied  smile.  Her 
pitiful  plight  touches  some  chord  in  his 
hardened  nature  which  responds  faintly. 
Stooping  he  places  his  hand  upon  her 
brow  and  throwing  back  her  head  looks 
intently  into  her  eyes. 

OTHUBS 

(Tensely}  It  shall  not  be  said  that  Wynott  Othurs 
is  not  a  dead-game  sport.  I  shall  give  you  one  chance. 
You  and  I  will  play  one  hand  of  casino.  The  stake  is 
to  be — yourself.  Come! 

[OTHURS  goes  to  table  and  sits  down  on  the 
side  aivay  from  the  place  where  BOHEMIA 
still  remains  on  the  floor. 
(Pointing  at  chair  opposite  to  him)     Come! 

[BOHEMIA  rises.    OTHURS  continues  to  point. 
Come! 

78 


THE    LURE    OF    THE    TRAFFIC 

[BOHEMIA  comes  forward  tremblingly  and 
takes  her  place  opposite  OTHURS.  The 
latter  deals  with  a  long,  low  gesture,  his 
eyes  riveted  upon  those  of  BOHEMIA. 
BOHEMIA  hides  a  card  in  her  stocking, 
but  OTHURS  sees  it  and  like  a  flash 
reaches  across  the  table  and  seizes  her 
wrist. 

No,  no,  little  one,  none  of  that  Belasco  business  here! 
[OTHURS  gathers  up  the  cards  and  laughs 
mockingly.  After  shuffling  expertly  he 
deals  again,  and  again  he  looks  BOHEMIA 
steadily  in  the  eye.  OTHURS  takes  one 
trick  after  another,  gathering  them  in 
with  a  snake-like  gesture.  BOHEMIA 
takes  only  a  feiv  tricks.  She  counts  her 
cards. 

You  lose,  babe.     (He  laughs.) 

[BOHEMIA  throws  her  arms  across  the  table 
and  buries  her  face  between  them. 
OTHURS  goes  to  inner  door,  unlocks  and 
opens  it,  he  then  picks  BOHEMIA  up  in  his 
arms  and  starts  toward  the  adjoining 
room.  As  he  does  so,  the  sound  of  fire 
bells  is  heard  and  a  cloud  of  smoke  pours 
through  the  open  door.  OTHURS  recoils 
holding  his  arm  before  his  face.  The 
sound  of  heavy  blows  on  the  other  door 
are  heard.  It  is  finally  broken  open  and 

79 


THE    LURE    OF    THE    TRAFFIC 

a  fireman  enters  in  a  cloud  of  smoke  and 
flames.  BOHEMIA  has  evaded  OTHURS 
and  runs  into  the  fireman's  arms.  At  the 
same  moment  LOKELEY  runs  out  of  the 
inner  room,  screaming  and  dashes  out 
the  other  door.  The  fireman,  holding 
BOHEMIA'S  fainting  form,  makes  his  way 
to  where  the  motto  hangs  and  pulling  it 
down  from  the  wall  carries  it  and 
BOHEMIA  out  triumphantly.  OTHURS,  who 
has  been  groping  about  blindly  in  the 
smoke,  starts  to  follow,  then  stops  and 
turning  round,  gropes  his  way  back 
toward  the  table.  He  feels  about  for  the 
cards.  Gathering  them  up  he  staggers 
toward  the  door. 
The  cards!  The  cards!  I  have  saved  the  cards! 


CURTAIN 


80 


SCENE  1. 

Among  the  ruins.  At  one  side  a  temporary  shade 
made  of  packing  cases  and  rusty  sheet  iron.  On 
the  side  of  the  shack  is  a  "Proclamation"  signed 
"Eugene  Schmitz,  mayor."  In  front  of  the  hovel  is 
an  improvised  stove  made  of  old  bricks.  BOHEMIA 
is  discovered  cooking.  Her  garments  are  made  of 
gunny  sacking.  She  has  a  furtive,  hunted  look 
in  her  face.  Steps  sound  on  the  sidewalk  with- 
out and  she  darts  toward  the  shack  to  hide.  The 
sound  of  a  tin  horn  is  heard  and  a  voice — ^patently 
that  of  a  foreigner,  probably  an  Italian — calling 
"Fresh  fish."  BOHEMIA,  reassured,  comes  out  of 
shack. 

Enter  an  Italian  fish  peddler. 

PEDDLER 

Fresha   feesh!      Fresha   feesh!      Fresha   makarell! 
Who  want  da  beega  da  salm? 

BOHEMIA 
Oh,  what  wouldn't  I  give  tor  a  piece  of  salmon! 

81 


THE    LURE    OP    THE    TRAFFIC 


PEDDLER 

(Taking  off  his  hat)  Hello,  mees.  You  lika  da 
feesh? 

BOHEMIA 
Alas,  yes;  but  I  have  no  money. 

PEDDLER 

No  speeka  da  mon.  Everybody  have  too  mucha  da 
trub.  Here  taka  da  feesh.  (Handing  BOHEMIA  a  large 
salmon). 

BOHEMIA 

(Talcing  fish  and  hugging  it)  Oh,  God  bless  you! 
God  bless  you!  You  are  so  kind.  I  hope  no  trouble 
has  come  to  you  during  these  awful  days. 

PEDDLER 

Trub?  Me?  No.  Da  blessta  Madon  have  watch 
over  Giuseppe  Palladini.  All  my-a  famalee  eskep 
excep  ma  wifa  mud.  But  you,  mees,  you  have  much 
trub.  I  can  see  eet  een  your  fass. 

BOHEMIA 

Yes.  I  am  all  alone  in  the  world.  Even  the  man 
I  was  going  to  marry  has  been  swallowed  up  in  the 
great  catastrophe.  I  have  prayed  every  day  and  every 
night  to  St.  John  of  Nepomuk  that  he  should  be 
returned  to  me;  that  I  might  see  those  ruddy  cheeks, 
those  blue  eyes,  that  curly  yellow  hair  again. 

PEDDLER 

(Excitedly)  Da  redda  cheek?  Occhi  azzurri?  Da 
curia  da  hair?  Conte  Monte  Cristo!  I  have  found 
heem!  Deed  he  hev  da  dirta  feenger  nail? 

82 


THE    LURE     OF    THE    TRAFFIC 

BOHEMIA 

(Greatly  moved)  Yes,  his  finger  nails  were  always 
filthy.  Oh,  my  lover,  my  lover!  It  is  he! 

PEDDLER 

I  catena  da  young  fel  lika  dat  in  my  feesha  net  da 
night  when  da  bigga  fire  come.  I  bring  heem  to  you. 
1  bring  heem  to  you. 

[The  PEDDLER  runs  off  and  BOHEMIA  falls  on 
her  knees. 

BOHEMIA 

Oh,  good  St.  John  of  Nepomuk,  bring  Philip  back! 
Save  me  from  Othurs  and — from  myself. 

Enter  MUSET,  ARTIE,  LETTY  and  DRAMMAH. 

[They    are   sumptuously    dressed.      BOHEMIA 
returns  to  her  cooking. 

MUSET 

Isn't  it  perfectly  dreadful!  What  these  poor  people 
must  have  suffered.  (Seeing  BOHEMIA)  Here's  one 
of  them  now.  Er,  my  good  woman,  I  am  curious  to 
know  if  the  bread-line  is  being  properly  conducted. 
They  say  that  too  much  food  is  being  given  out  to 
undeserving  cases — people  who  won't  work.  (BOHEMIA 
looks  up)  Why,  bless  my  life,  if  it  isn't  Bohemia! 
BOHEMIA 

Oh,  Muset!  Oh,  girls!  I'm  so  glad  you  found  me. 
My!  don't  you  look  fine!  Where  did  you  get  such 
clothes? 

83 


ACT  V,  Scene  I. 

THE    RUINS. 

r'Do  not  turn  from  muh,  Bohemia." 


THE    LURE    OP    THE    TRAFFIC 

ARTIE 

Oh,    we    got    these    from    the    Relief    Committee. 
(Winks  at  other  girls)  But  what  are  you  doing  here? 

BOHEMIA 

I'm  waiting  for  Philip.  He's  been  found  and  he'll 
be  here  in  a  minute. 

LETTY 
Don't  let  us  keep  you.    We  must  be  going. 

DRAMMAH 

Do  look  us  up  some  time,  Bohemia,  we'll  be  so 
glad  to  see  you. 

OTHER  GIRLS 
Yes,  do,  do.  [They  go  out. 

BOHEMIA 
Ruins  everywhere! 

Enter  WYNOTT  OTHURS 

[He  is  dressed  entirely  in  brand  new  khaki 
and  ivears  a  small  sombrero  and  high- 
laced  boots  outside  his  trousers.  The 
usual  diamond  pin  sparkles  in  his  neck- 
tie. BOHEMIA  seeing  him  shrinks  back 
with  a  low,  gutteral  cry  of  horror. 

OTHURS 

Do  not  turn  from  muh,  Bohemia.  I  have  sought 
you  out  to  tell  you  that  I  repent  m'  behavior  on  that 
dreadful  night.  I  must  have  been  mad — mad  for  love 
of  you.  Forgive  muh!  Since  then  I  have  been  think- 

85 


THE    LURE    OF    THE    TRAFFIC 


ing  constantly  of  you.  You  must  forgive  muh!  I 
want  you  to  be  m'  wife,  Bohemia.  I  have  built  a 
beautiful  Class  E  residence  for  you  just  two  blocks 
down  the  street  at  Post  and  Taylor.  Won't  you  for- 
give and  forget? 

BOHEMIA 

(Proudly)  Not  while  the  breath  of  life  is  in  m' 
body!  Mr.  Goodfellow  will  be  here  in  a  moment.  You 
will  have  to  answer  to  him  for  your  unseemly  behavior 
toward  me. 

[OTHURS  lunges  toivard  BOHEMIA  with  a 
savage  look  in  his  face  and  seizes  her  by 
the  wrist.  Just  as  he  does  so  the  Italian 
fish  peddler  enters  accompanied  by 
another  Italian. 

BOHEMIA 

Ah  signor,  you  are  just  in  time!  (She  sees  the 
young  Italian  and  stops  petrified.) 

PEDDLER 
Ees  dees-a  heem? 

BOHEMIA 

(Wildly)  No-no-no-no-no!  NO!  (She  shrieks  and 
faints  in  OTHURS'  arms,  murmuring)  Take  me  with 
you.  I  can  resist  no  longer. 

[OTHURS  leads  BOHEMIA  off.  The  young 
Italian  tears  off  his  disguise.  It  is  PHILIL* 
GOODFELLOW. 

PHIL. 
The  villain  still  pursues  her.     (Picking  up  a  piece 

86 


THE    LURE    OF    THE    TRAFFIC 

of  the  ruins  and  brandishing  it)     Bohemia  must  be 
saved! 

[PHILIP  starts  to  run  in  the  direction  taken  by 
OTHURS.  As  he  does  so,  however,  the 
Italian  peddler  Hows  a  police  whistle  at 
the  same  time  taking  off  his  disguise.  It 
is  GENTLEMAN  FRANK.  Just  as  PHILIP  is 
about  to  run  off,  his  passage  is  blocked 
by  OFFICER  TOOLE,  who  pokes  his  night- 
stick in  the  pit  of  PHILIP'S  stomach. 

OFFICER  T. 
Not  so  fast,  me  bucko. 

GENT.  F. 
Officer,  arrest  that  man  for  digging  in  the  ruins. 

[OFFICER  TOOLE  puts  handcuffs  on  PHILIP. 

GENT.  F. 

(Aside  to  officer)  See  that  he  goes  up  where  he 
won't  peach. 

OFFICER  T. 

Lave  it  t'  me  an'  me  friend,  Judge  Venal.   We  know 
how  t'  look  afther  a  job  like  this.    (He  taps  the  Proc- 
lamation with  his  night  stick.) 
GENT.  F. 

Whom  do  you  mean  by  "we?" 
OFFICER  T. 

Why  me  an'  th'  higher-ups.  (Singing  as  he  leads 
PHILIP  away)  There's  a  purty  schpat  in  Ireland,  I 
always  claim  it  my  land,  etc. 

87 


THE  LURE  OP  THE  TRAFFIC 
SCENE  2, 

The  Church  of  St.  John  of  Nepomuk.  It  is  Christ- 
mas Eve.  Snow  covers  the  ground  and  falls  con- 
tinuously. The  church  is  warmly  lighted  and  a 
rosy  light  streams  from  door  and  windows  upon 
the  snow. 

Enter  LORELEY  MONTRIO. 

She  is  in  rags  and  has  a  shabby  shawl  over  her  head. 
She  shivers  miserably. 

LORELEY 

Gee!  aint  it  cold!  I'm  all  in.  I'd  give  my  right 
hand  for  a  glass  of  gin.  Not  a  pickup  all  night. 
Everybody  complaining  about  the  big  frost! 

Enter  respectable  citizen,  ivalking  rapidly. 

LORELEY 

(Leering  and  accosting  him)  Hello,  sonny!  Say 
what's  your  hurry?  (Taking  his  arm)  Come  along 
with  me,  sonny.  I've  got  a  room  round  the  corner. 

[LOKELEY  tries  to  drag  him  with  her,  but  the 
young  man  disengages  himself  gently. 
Opening  his  coat  he  takes  out  a  pocket- 
book  and  from  it  a  card  which  he  gives 
to  LORELEY. 

YOUNG  MAN 
Here,    take    that.      They    will    be    glad    to    be    of 


THE    LURE     OP    THE    TRAFFIC 


assistance    to    you.      The    office    opens    at    9    in    the 
looming.     (Goes  out.) 

LORELEY 

(Reading  card)     Organized    Charities!     9    in    the 
morning!     Hell! 

[Tears  up  card  and  throws  the  pieces  away. 

Enter  WYNOTT  OTIIURS  and  BOHEMIA. 

[OTHUES  wears  an  overcoat  with  fur  collar 
and  a  silk  hat.  LORELEY  stepping  up  puts 
her  hands  on  OTHURS'  arm.  He  stops 
and  looks  at  her.  BOHEMIA  passes  on  and 
kneels  in  the  snow  in  front  of  the  church. 

OTHUBS 
(To  LORELEY)     Has  it  come  to  this? 

LORELEY 

Yes,  to  this.    You  threw  me  down,  Wynott,  and  I've 
had  to  do  the  best  I  could  for  myself.    This  is  it. 

OTHURS 
Well,  what  do  you  want  from  me? 

LORELEY 
Nothing  but  a  kind  word,  Wynott. 

OTHURS 

We're  all  out.     There's   a  quarter.      (Proffering   a 
coin)    Go  and  drink  yourself  to  death. 

LORELEY 

(Proudly)  .    I  may  be  cnly  a  street-walker,  but  it 
was  you,  Wynott  Othurs,  who  made  me  so.     I  may 

89 


THE    LURE    OP    THE    TRAFFIC 


take  money  for  what  I  have  to  sell,  but  I  shall  not 
accept  charity  from  a  dirty  hound  like  you! 

[LORELEY  goes  out  arid  OTHURS  shrugs  his 
shoulders  and  laughs.  BOHEMIA,  who 
has  been  kneeling  before  the  church, 
stretches  her  arms  toward  it  as  if  for 
comfort. 

OTHURS 

(Assisting  her  to  her  feet)  You  and  I  will  be 
married  in  there  some  day,  Bohemia.  See,  here  come 
the  choristers. 

[They  step  to  one  side  and  a  band  of 
choristers  enters,  singing  and  passes  into 
the  church. 

OTHURS 

Come  let  us  enter.  It  is  the  feast  of  Christmas. 
Come! 

[BOHEMIA  approaches  door  of  church  hesi- 
tantly. OTHURS  stands  at  the  threshold 
holding  out  his  hand  to  her. 

BOHEMIA 

(Faltering  at  the  portal)  No!  No!  I  cannot  go 
inside.  I  know  not  why. 

OTHURS 
(Fiercely)     Stay  out  then,  damn  you! 

[OTHURS  seizes  BOHEMIA  and  flinging  her  in 
the  snoiv,  rushes  into  the  church.  The 
music  continues  within.  After  a  little 
BOHEMIA  rises  slowly  with  moans  and 

90 


THE    LURE    OF    THE    TRAFFIC 

drags  herself  to  a  window  through  which 
she  looks  eagerly.  The  music  continues, 
but  disturbing  noises  are  heard.  These 
increase  gradually  until  it  sounds  as  if 
pandemonium  had  broken  loose  within 
the  church.  Suddenly  the  roof  of  the 
edifice  falls  in  and  red  fire  and  Roman 
candles  are  seen  to  issue  from  it.  The 
din  of  singing  and  howling  continues  and 
OTHURS  finally  appears  at  the  door.  He 
has  a  wreath  upon  his  head.  In  one 
hand  he  holds  a  champagne  bottle  and  in 
the  oilier  a  glass. 
OTHURS 

Wheel     Christmas  comes  but  once  a  year.     Three 
cheers  for  Bohemia!     Come  along,  dear! 

[OTHURS  seizes  BOHEMIA  and  drags  her  into 
the  church.  There  is  a  great  burst  of 
red  fire,  Roman  candles  and  noise  as  the 
curtain  falls. 


CURTAIN 


91 


fit  Yi. 


One  year  later.  The  central  court  of  a  gilded  palace 
on  the  corner  of  Post  and  Taylor  Streets,  San 
Francisco.  The  room  is  handsomely  finished  in 
Mississippi  gum,  chewed  into  shape  by  contract 
prison  labor  among  the  dismal  swamps.  It  is 
luxuriously  furnished  and  there  are  many  paint- 
ings and  pieces  of  statuary.  The  crewel-work 
motto  "BOHEMIA'S  HOME  IS  HERE"  hangs  on 
the  wall  in  a  richly  carved  and  gilded  frame. 
Suspended  in  the  center  of  the  apartment  is  a 
large  golden  cage  containing  an  owl.  A  voice  off 
stage  is  heard  singing: 

SONG. 

(  Solo,  with  humming  accompaniment) 
She's  only  a  bird  in  a  gilded  cage — 
A  beautiful  sight  to  see. 

You  may  think  she  is  happy  and  free  from  care — 
She's  not  tho'  she  seems  to  be; 

Once  she  was  playmates  with  Music  and  Art,  Litera- 
ture and  the  Stage, 

But  her  freedom  she  sold  for  a  businessman's  gold — 
She's  a  bird  in  a  gilded  cage. 

93 


THE    LURE    OF    THE    TRAFFIC 


BOHEMIA  is  discovered  reclining  languidly  upon  a 
large  leather  couch.  She  is  clad  in  cloth  of  gold 
and  wears  a  profusion  of  jewelry.  She  is  smoking 
a  cigarette  and  is  as  lovely  as  ever,  but  looks 
wiser.  WYNOTT  OTHUKS  is  sitting  near  her  in  a 
handsome  carved  chair.  His  hair  is  slightly 
silvered  at  the  temples.  Near  l>y  is  a  small  table 
on  which  stand  tivo  half-tasted  drinks.  The  click 
of  dominoes  is  heard  from  an  adjoining  room. 

OTHURS 

How  much  longer  must  I  wait,  O  fairest  of  all 
women?  Last  Christmas  you  told  me  that  when 
Christmas  came  again  .  .  .  (Shaking  finger  at  her 
teasingly)  Now  don't  you  remember  saying  that? 

BOHEMIA 
(Greatly  bored)    Oh,  I  suppose  I  did  say  it. 

OTHURS 

Yes,  and  what  have  I  be^n  doing  ever  since? 
Spending  money  on  you  like  water  and  giving  you 
everything  your  little  heart  desired.  Why,  do  you 
know  that  one  al  fresco  entertainment  alone  last 
August  cost  me  a  full  $10,000.  And  when  you  com- 
plained that  you  were  stifled  by  the  atmosphere  in 
this  house  did  I  not  throw  financial  discretion  to  the 
winds  and  change  the  ventilating  system? 

BOHEMIA 
Well  am  I  worth  it  or  not? 

OTHURS 

Of  course  you're  worth  it,  but  you  see  I'm  just  a 
94 


THE    LURE    OF    THE    TRAFFIC 


plain    businessman,    and    as    a    business    proposition 
these  entertainments  of  yours  are  overdone. 

BOHEMIA 

Well,  I  notice  that  unless  I  give  some  sort  of  an 
entertainment  nobody  comes  to  see  me  any  more 
except  a  few  of  father's  friends  who  like  to  drop  in 
for  a  quiet  game  of  dominoes  now  and  then.  Oh,  it  is 
such  an  exciting  life!  (She  yawns)  I  think  I'll  go 
and  watch  the  sport.  [She  goes  out. 

[OTHURS  paces  the  floor,  biting  his  lip  and 
slapping  the  palm  of  one  hand  with  the 
fist  of  the  other,  behind  his  back. 

«fc 
Enter  MUSET,  ARTIE,  LETTY  and  DRAM M AH. 

[They  are  gorgeously  gowned,  but  appear 
lackadaisical.  OTHURS  sees  them  and 
stops. 

OTHURS 

Look  here,  you.  I'm  tired  of  you  hanging  around 
here  all  the  time.  This  is  no  home  for  fallen  women. 
You  all  fell  for  the  game  like  dogs  for  a  bone,  ^and  I've 
been  keeping  the  whole  bunch  of  you  in  clothes  for 
over  a  year.  Now  unless  you  help  me  put  over  this 
job  on  Bohemia  you'll  never  get  another  cent  out  of 
me,  see?  You'll  have  to  go  on  the  street  like  Loreley 
Montrio.  And  you're  not  the  popular  kind,  you  know; 
you're  too  damned  refined.  Now,  listen.  When 
Bohemia  comes  in  I'll  order  a  drink.  I've  got  some 

95 


THE    LURE     OF    THE    TRAFFIC 

knock-out  drops  here.  Distract  her  attention  and  I'll 
put  'em  in  her  glass,  see?  If  she  refuses  to  drink, 
why  then  it's  the  bottle.  Two  of  you  grab  her  arms 
and  the  other  two  her  feet.  When  I  say  "Won't  you 
change  your  mind?"  grab,  see?  Shshsh!  Here  she 
comes. 

Enter  BOHEMIA. 

[OTHURS  touches  bell  and  a  waiter  appears. 

OTHURS 
What'll  you  have? 

[The  waiter  stoops  over  each  one  successively 
and  receives  the  orders. 

BOHEMIA 

Nothing  for  me,  thank  you. 
OTHURS 

Give    me    a    Number  9.      (To  BOHEMIA  as  waiter 
departs)     Won't  you  change  your  mind? 

[With  one  accord  the  four  girls  leap  upon 
BOHEMIA  and  pinion  her  hand  and  foot. 
OTHURS  attempts  to  force  the  contents  of 
a  phial  down  her  throat.  BOHEMIA 
struggles  madly. 

OTHURS 
Here,  Muset,  don't  pull  Bohemia's  leg  so  much. 

[The  waiter  returning  with  the  drinks,  sees 
what  is  going  on  and  pulls  off  his  dis- 
guise. It  is  PHILIP  GOODFELLOW.  He 
pulls  a  revolver  and  strikes  OTHURS  a 

96 


THE    LURE    OF    THE    TRAFFIC 

violent  blow  on  the  head  with  the  butt, 
felling  him  to  the  ground,  then  seizing 
BOHEMIA  around  the  waist  as  she  swoons, 
stands  ready  to  defend  her.  At  the  same 
moment  SAM  Sisco  and  CALLIE  appear 
from  behind  two  statues  of  a  Cave  Man 
and  Diana  and  point  revolvers  at  the 
group. 

PHIL. 

I  desire  no  man's  life.  If  this  creature  is  in  need  of 
professional  aid  ring  up  the  clinic  and  get  Dr. 
Mosenhead.,.  (Looking  at  his  watch)  No,  it  is  almost 
midnight,  Dr.  Mosenhead  must  be  in  the  library. 

Enter  DR.  MOSENHEAD. 

Ah,  Doctor,  you  are  just  in  time.  Be  so  good  as  to 
attend  to  that  man.  He  has  received  a  severe  blow 
upon  the  head  and  is  unconscious. 

DR.  M. 

(Kneeling  and  supporting  OTHURS)  I  see  it!  I  see 
it! — an  operation! 

OTHURS 
(Reviving)    Where  am  I? 

DR.  M. 

You  are  among  friends,  my  friend.  (Recognizing 
OTHURS)  What  is  it  I  see,  Wynott  Othurs!  Oh  you 
loafer!  I  know  you!  Yes!  You  are  the  vermin  that 
recruit  the  moving  picture  houses  of  this  fair  city! 

97 


THE    LURE    OF    THE    TRAFFIC 


You  have  ruined  the  Tivoli  girl,  and  now — oh,  you 
loal'er! — you  are  trying  to  debauch  this  beautiful 
maiden!  No!  I  will  have  nothing  to  do  with  you. 

[Gets  up  and  stands  with  hands  behind  back 

shaking  head  stubbornly. 
I  refuse  t'  operate! 

OTHUBS 

What  has  happened?  My  head  feels  so  strange  and 
yet  so  clear,  so  clear. 

PHIL. 
But,  Doctor,  I  insist  you  must  care  for  this  man. 

[DR.  M.  continues  to  shake  his  head  stubbornly. 
You  will  be  paid,  well  paid. 
DR.  M. 

Well,  if  you  insist.  (Examines  OTHURS'  head)  Ah, 
I  see  it.  Something  strange  has  happened — very 
strange.  A  clot  on  the  brain.  It  has  been  removed. 
An  operation  is  not  necessary,  but  I  shall  operate  just 
the  same. 

OTHURS 

It  is  all  like  a  horrible  dream.  I  have  done  wrong. 
It  was  the  clot  on  my  brain  that  did  it.  I  am  not  a 
bad  man!  Won't  you  believe  me? 

BOHEMIA 

(Stepping  forward)  Yes.  We  believe  you  and  for- 
give you. 

DR.  M. 
I  want  t'  operate. 

98 


THE    LURE    OP    THE    TRAFFIC 

OTHURS 

As  bad  as  I  have  been,  I,  at  least,  have  done  some 
good.  I  have  kept  these  girls  from  starvation.  Some- 
thing impelled  me  to  take  care  of  them — some  impulse 
that  I  did  not  understand.  It  must  have  been  because 
they  were  friends  of  yours,  Bohemia. 

BOHEMIA 

You  were  good  to  them  for  my  sake.     How  good  of 
you — how  noble!      (Gives  OTHURS  her  hand.) 
Enter  MME.  NECESSITY  sobbing. 

MME.  N. 

Oh,  forgive  me,  forgive  me!  I  sought  to  do  you 
wrong,  Bohemia.  I  did  everything  I  could  to  put  you 
in  a  Movie  House.  I  know  it  was  wicked,  but  I  was 
under  the  influence  of  Wynott.  He  was  like  my  own 
brother — the  wayward  boy.  But  I  have  been  struck 
by  the  wave  of  reform.  Those  dear  ladies  of  the 
Calpurnia  Club  have  been  talking  to  me. 

CALLIE 

What  did  I  tell  yerv  Samuel?  It  teks  th'  wimmin 
folk  ter  set  things  right! 

MME.  N. 

It  is  -not  too  late.  1  must  tell  you  what  I  know. 
Mrs.  Sisco,  you  had  a  brother  once.  He  left  home  in 
his  early  youth.  (CALLIE  nods  with  suppressed  excite- 
ment) Tattooed  upon  a  part  of  his  anatomy  which 
would  be  rarely  seen  by  casual  acquaintances,  that 
brother  bore  a  mark — the  mark  of  an  owl — is  it  not 
99 


ACT   VI. 

THE    MARK    OF  THE   OWL. 

"Every  lady  in  this  room  except  Bohemia  has  seen 
that  mark  on — HIM!" 


THE    LURE    OP    THE    TRAFFIC 

so?  (CALLIE  nods  again)  Every  lady  in  this  room 
except  Bohemia  has  seen  that  mark  on  HIM.  (MME. 
N.  points  dramatically  at  OTHURS.) 

CALLIE 
(Hysterically)    Oh,  my  long  lost  brother! 

BOHEMIA 
Me  prophetic  soul!    me  UNCLE! 

DR.  M. 
I  want  t'  operate! 

CALLIE 

You  are  found  at  last.  For  twenty-five  years  the 
estate  our  father  left  has  bin  tied  up.  We  kin  now 
git  th'  money  and  lift  th'  mortgage  offen  th'  old  farm 
by  thd  irrigatin'  ditch. 

BOHEMIA 
Yes,  and  the  encumbrances  on  this  house,  too. 

PHIL. 
Is  Judge  Smith  in  the  house? 

Enter  JUDGE  SMITH. 

JUDGE  S. 
Here  I  am.     What  can  I  do  for  you? 

PHIL. 
Oh,  not  much.    I  want  you  to  marry  us. 

JUDGE  S. 
That's  one  of  the  best  things  I  do. 

DR.  M. 
I  want  t'  operate!     I  want  t'  operate! 

101 


THE    LURE     OF    THE    TRAFFIC 

SAM  Sisco 

By  heck!  I  aint  had  much  ter  say  in  these  'ere 
doins,  but  I'm  a-goin'  ter  say  somethin'  now.  (Rolls 
up  sleeves  and  confronts  DR.  MOSENHEAD.  )  You 
shut  up! 

[The  bride  and  groom  take  positions  at  center 
surrounded  by  the  rest  of  the  party. 
Singing  is  heard  and  choristers  enter 
singing — "Here  we  come  a-was sailing." 
A  wedding  cake  is  brought  in.  JUDGE 
SMITH  stands  before  the  couple  and 
extends  his  arms  in  blessing.  The 
choristers  and  the  rest  of  the  company 
join  the  song  "Love  and  joy  come  tc 
you." 


CURTAIN 


